Fotolia

26 Women Graphically Describe Their 1st Postpartum Poop

By
Share
Ad failed to load

Before I had my first child, I never thought about postpartum pooping and I certainly never talked about it. Turns out, it's horrible, but I was way too shy to mention it to anyone. Now, after three postpartum poops and more than a few diaper blowouts, toddlers pooping in the bath tub, and potty training accidents, I'm so unfazed by poop that I talk about it all of the time. I wondered if postpartum pooping was just bad for me, and not for others, so I asked some other parents to describe their first postpartum poop to see if painful pooping postpartum was a shared experience, or if I was just unlucky.

Holy crap (pun intended) it turns out that most of the people I asked deserve a solidarity fist bump. My straw poll revealed that other moms experienced similarly difficulties, including painful and even scarier postpartum pooping than I did, and all without epidurals because why don't they give us epidurals for the postpartum pooping process you guys? Once again and always, postpartum moms are the real MVPs. And the moms who had relatively easy experiences? They had one thing in common: preparation. It seems that for life, parenting, and definitely for postpartum pooping, preparation is everything.

So moms-to-be, if you are squeamish about poop, or you're ashamed to ask another mom or your doctor about how to prepare for postpartum pooping, read on for some tips and tricks (and a few horror stories), to make your postpartum pooping experience go a little bit smoother. May the odds be ever in your favor.

Ad failed to load

Patricia, 37

Giphy

"It was so bad. After the emergency C-section I already felt like I was cut open, then they wanted me to poop. There are not enough stool softeners in the world to make my dissected stomach muscles want to push a poop out. I cried, and a nurse held my hand, for 15 minutes before anything moved. It was more agonizing than the healing muscles and tissues."

Cianna, 25

"I screamed on the toilet very loudly when I realized what was happening. I used the peri bottle that I had filled up with hot water and sprayed behind me while I screamed and stomped my feet. I survived, though. Once it was happening it wasn't as bad as I thought, but nothing could prepare me for 10 months of postpartum hemorrhoids. I would rather have a first postpartum poop forever than go through that."

Shelby

Giphy

"It felt like my C-section incision and battered vagina were both going to explode. Also, I still had a catheter in, so every time I tried to push the poop out it felt like my urethra was being attacked with a lit sparkler."

Ad failed to load

Kristine, 30

"It was like giving birth again, except with more blood and nothing to snuggle with afterward."

Danielle, 24

Giphy

"I was worried about it being bad because it had been almost a week and I had stitches. I had my mom hold the baby right outside the door for emotional support, but it was actually easy peasy, and I ended up laughing about it because I expected way worse. I did take stool softeners as prescribed. But I also was constipated before labor and had a nurse wiping my ass as baby made his descent. At least I know now for next time that I need to take Colace third trimester to prevent that nightmare from happening again. LOL."

Jenny, 38

"A friend had given me the heads up that his wife had experienced a really painful first postpartum poop after their first child was born. He recommended that I take a stool softener in the hospital. When the time came, I asked and the nurse seemed surprised that I wanted one, but I insisted. I kept taking them until I had that first poop on day three. It was easy. No pain. I followed the same protocol after giving birth to my second baby, only this time I didn't have to ask the nurses for stool softeners. Instead, they just gave them to me."

Ad failed to load

Anonymous

Giphy

"Usually I'm regular, once a day even being almost 41 weeks pregnant when I gave birth. Well, since I was away from home and induced, I hadn't gone in two or three days. Oh Mylanta. It hurt so bad! I'd had a pretty normal vaginal birth and a few small 'surface' tears, nothing serious, but counter pressure is absolutely the way to help it out. I asked for stool softeners but I don't really think they made a difference. It looked just like normal. The second movement was definitely better than the first though."

Jamie

"As someone who has IBS, I thought I'd experienced all the types of pooping one could imagine. I had torn a bit but it was more on the inside of my vaginal wall and wasn't a candidate for stitches. It burned so much but numbing cream did nothing. I was still in the hospital when I needed to have my first poop, so I had my peri bottle filled with cold water (such a mistake) to keep me cool when it was hot down there. To my surprise the only unpleasantness was the actual cold water freezing my bits. My fright and the horror I'd read about were all for naught. For once in my life, my IBS made it easy to slip right out. LOL"

Nikki, 22

Giphy

"I have described the first postpartum poop as 'the second birth' to anyone who will listen. I literally held myself together with a warm washcloth when I went for the first time. Oh, the glamour of childbirth."

Ad failed to load

Kay

"I felt pregnant. I was so constipated for three days after a C-section and afraid to take a stool softener because I have IBS. I don't recall it hurting at all. It just took too long to happen."

Cassandra

Giphy

"My first postpartum poop happened about 12 hours after I gave birth and while I was still in the hospital. It scared the sh*t out of me. I was going pee and it just came on suddenly. I had been taking a stool softener with my pain meds, but I didn't expect it to be a watery stool. Lucky for my hemorrhoids, it was. I half-screamed in the bathroom when it started, and my husband came running. It was pretty amusing. I hadn't realized how backed up I was until it came out. It was such a relief."

Sophie, 23

"The idea of the first poop for me was absolutely terrifying, but I had taken enough of the stool softener they gave me that it was OK. I only had a few stitches from birth, so I wasn't so concerned about them. That first pee hurt really bad, though. I'm sure my stitches were right by my urethra, it took about a week for it to not sting."

Ad failed to load

Sarah, 25

Giphy

"It felt like Satan was trying to emerge from my asshole. I'm 25, with four kids. I thought I was going to die after my first birth because I had an episiotomy."

Jessica, 24

"My first I was horrified because of a 3rd degree tear. I'd heard everyone's stories about how awful it was and it made me scared to poop so I ended up waiting too long. I was also on pain medicine so that probably made it worse. By the time I finally went I had read tips online so I decided to use a frozen pad for counter pressure on my stitches. It still felt like I was pooping glass, though. The second time I took my stool softeners from the moment I left the hospital and it wasn't bad at all."

Emily

Giphy

"OMG. Day six postpartum from first baby, vaginal delivery. I knew Colace wasn't going to make much of a damn difference, because it hadn't for my whole pregnancy. I was scared, but I wasn't prepared for the fact that I couldn't get it out. Like, I knew it would hurt, but it was actually too big.

I was shouting for my husband because I genuinely thought I needed to go to the ER. He couldn't hear me, and I didn't have my phone, so I thought I was going to rupture something all by myself with no one noticing. I used way more hypnobreathing techniques than I ever did in pregnancy! Finally I succeeded, though I ended up with a fissure, and my husband had to spend 30 mins breaking it up to get the toilet to flush. True love."

Ad failed to load

Anonymous

"I was young and stupid with my first and too proud to accept the stool softeners (I had issues with constipation prior to pregnancy, so I don't know what I was thinking). Holy crap. Four days later and I thought I was dying. I had him with no pain meds, despite being induced with pitocin, but I swear this was more painful."

Brandi

Giphy

"You always hear of the horror stories about pooping after delivery. You never hear, 'Oh, my first poop post delivery was easy peasy.' You won't understand why until you push out a baby and rip and tear. Your entire downstairs feels like it's torn apart. I'll never forget the nurses telling me the importance of needing to poop before I was discharged. They were even nice enough to give me stool softeners at one point.

Peeing alone was stressful enough that when it was finally time to go number two, I was sweating before I even sat down. Every push felt like I was reliving childbirth. I thought for sure my insides were on the verge of falling out. The pressure and overall soreness was extremely painful and then came the burning, as my tears felt like they were ripping even more. It's honestly a sh*tty experience, and there's no other way to describe it."

Stasia, 26

"I had to poop before I left the hospital. I really didn't want to. They set me up with Colace, Dermoplast (benzocaine spray), and a peri bottle. Let's just say, I gave the most minimum amount of effort allowed so I could leave. Pooping after labor is terrifying."

Ad failed to load

Jenny

Giphy

"I don't recall receiving any stool softeners in the hospital after having a C-section, and I didn't take any once I was home. It was terrible. My mom could tell I was desperate and in pain, and she asked a question that only a mother would ask: 'Do you have Vaseline and a glove?' I declined her offer."

Andrea

"I couldn't but I really, really needed to. The toilet was at a higher level than I was used to and I couldn't make it work. Finally I grabbed the wastebasket, stuck my feet on it so I was in a semi-squatting position (still on toilet of course), and it happened."

Kaitlin, 27

Giphy

"I can never be thankful enough for the nurse who brought me Colace the moment I got to my postpartum room. My hospital gives it to everyone after birth during their stay to preemptively try to make sure it's less traumatic. Day two postpartum I had myself all worried, but didn't have issues, thankfully. I could have kissed that nurse."

Ad failed to load

Katherine

"I birthed my son four years ago. Every poop since that day has been different than any poop I ever had before delivering. I had a 4th degree tear, so I had stitching into my rectal muscle. I experience some discomfort every day while rubbing the stitches when wiping after bowel movements. I also have some, um, 'difficulty' while having sex. I think the nerve endings in that general area are confused. I feel like my husband is attempting anal when he tries to enter my vagina from behind. He insists he is never anywhere close to my anus."

Mackenzie

Giphy

"I wanted to go home so badly, and I knew they wouldn't let me leave the hospital until I pooped. So at the first hint of motion, I went into the bathroom and pushed as hard as I did during labor. It felt like a million tiny knives in my butt hole. But the pressure was on (literally). I cried. I yelled. I cried some more. But I was not about to stay in the hospital with my awful postpartum nurse a minute longer than I needed to."

Cayleh

"Mine was not really bad at all. I had taken a shower at the hospital, and then sat down on the toilet and didn't try and force it or anything. I just relaxed and let gravity help. LOL. It probably helps that I didn't have to push long though, and had no hemorrhoids."

Ad failed to load

Stacy

Giphy

"I had two babies back to back. They are actually born on the same day, one year apart. I had an epidural with both deliveries and my first post delivery BM wasn't horrible, but it was definitely uncomfortable. My second baby, however, felt like I was being ripped apart. I was unaware of any complications but it turns out I had strained my perineum so badly that I tore internally. Trying to use the restroom for the two weeks following my delivery was excruciating."

Anonymous

"I had a 3rd degree tear for my first child, many stitches, and was taking Vicodin for postpartum pain for about a week after. Silly me, I thought it would be fine to stop taking the stool softeners after I got home. When I finally did go I felt like I was re-tearing everything back open, it was that awful. I hadn't gone in about 10 days and was literally crying in the bathroom. I didn't call the doctor because I was so embarrassed and just toughed it out. Second kid I had learned my lesson, took stool softeners on time every time and drank plenty of water and it was much easier. Yes, a little scary, but not even on the same planet pain wise. Moral of the story: don't be like me, take your stool softeners and if something is wrong tell your doctor. That's literally what they are there for."

Ad failed to load
Must Reads

Being A Dog Parent Prepared Me For Having A Baby, Really

I’ve always wanted kids; I was never as sure about raising a puppy. Then I spent six months living with someone who brought home an eight-week-old golden retriever puppy, and I see no way to make it out of that experience claiming not to love dogs. I…
By Heather Caplan

20 Of The Most Popular Unisex Names Of All Time, That You'll Be Hearing More Of For Sure

You might think of unisex names as a fairly recent trend, but the truth is these versatile monikers have been commonly used throughout history (well, some more commonly than others). That's why the team over at Names.org recently compiled a list of t…
By Jacqueline Burt Cote

How To Have A Date Night With No Babysitter, Because It's Easier Than You Think

After having children, many couples feel that their love lives immediately go out the window, but it's so important to make your romantic life a priority so both you and your partner can be the best versions of yourselves you can be. As we all know, …
By Abi Berwager Schreier

9 Ways Baby No. 3 Made My Family Feel Complete

My husband and I decided to have another baby right after we got married and, well, we had no idea what we were getting into. I got pregnant right away, endured a high-risk pregnancy, and, before I knew it, my third baby had arrived. Together, we emb…
By Steph Montgomery

8 Stereotypes About New Dads That Are *Totally* True

Much like new mothers, new fathers have a lot on their plate. Parenting can be scary and complex, especially at first and regardless of your gender. People want to do right by their kids, after all. And since all new parents are a hot mess, dads are …
By Priscilla Blossom

8 Differences Between Being Pregnant In Your 20s Vs 30s, According To Science

Whether you're planning a pregnancy, or just thinking about your future family, it's typical to think about things like child-spacing, how many kids you want, and when to start trying to conceive. When making your pro/con list, you might also conside…
By Steph Montgomery

16 Moms Share Remedies For Their Most Intense Chocolate Cravings During Pregnancy

For better or worse, pregnancy is usually synonymous with odd cravings. Sure, there are the stereotypical combos like pickles and ice cream that plague gestating women the world over, but there are other mind-boggling combinations, too, including but…
By Candace Ganger

Putting Sunscreen On Your Kid Doesn't Have To Be A Fight — Here's How To Do It

I am almost translucent, so me and sunscreen are basically besties at this point. Even though my children are beautifully deep brown thanks to my husband's genetics, I still slather them like biscuits being buttered because I refuse to take risks wit…
By Cat Bowen

7 Things A Mom Really Means When She Says She Doesn't Want Anything On Mother's Day

Every year my family asks me what I want for Mother's Day, and every single year I tell them the same thing: Nothing. So, by now, they know that when I say "nothing" I absolutely do not mean "nothing." In fact, there are more than a few things a mom …
By Candace Ganger

19 Moms Share The Way They Cured Their Pregnancy Comfort Food Cravings

I was obnoxiously sick during the first trimester with, "lucky" for me, both of my pregnancies. For the first three months I lived on saltines, lemonade, and fresh bread. Once I was able to eat, however, all I wanted was savory and sweet comfort food…
By Dina Leygerman

8 Fascinating Facts About Babies Born In May, The Luckiest Month Of All

The height of all things fresh and springy, May is an excellent month to have a baby. It's a time of growth, graduations, and outdoor celebrations. And these fascinating facts about May babies will give you more reasons than ever to appreciate childr…
By Lindsay E. Mack

I Used To Judge Formula-Feeding Moms — Until I Became One

The other patrons in the hip Brooklyn restaurant probably couldn’t care less what I was feeding my baby, but I’ll always remember the shame I felt as I quickly mixed up his bottle of formula in front of them. I admitted to my childless friend that I …
By Katherine Martinelli

7 White Lies It’s Necessary To Tell To Keep Your Relationship Healthy

Telling lots of lies typically isn't associated with a healthy, strong, lasting relationship, and that's still certainly true, but not all lies are exactly the same. Though you've probably heard from someone at least once or twice that the lie they t…
By Lauren Schumacker

The Skinny Jeans That Saved Me Postpartum

Accepting my post-pregnancy body is hands-down one of the most difficult things I’ve ever done. It’s something that I still work on every single day. During my first pregnancy, I was 20 years old, so I managed to bounce back quickly. In fact, I dropp…
By Allison Cooper

7 Ways Your Baby Is Trying To Say They Feel Safe

In those first weeks of new motherhood, it can feel like you need an interpreter for your newborn. With their limited means of communication, figuring out what message your baby is trying to get across to you can be a challenge. With time, however, y…
By Kimmie Fink

Here's Why Dogs Are Obsessed With Babies' Poop, According To Science

Most family dogs seem to understand babies, and they're more than happy to make friends with the newest member of the pack. It's adorable... for the most part and until you go to change your little one's diaper. Suddenly, you're wondering why dogs ar…
By Lindsay E. Mack

6 Signs You're Meant To Have A Big Age Gap Between Kids

There's a five year age difference between my two children, to the day. Their age gap wasn't planned but, for a variety of reasons, works well for our family. And since I was so focused on having a second baby, I totally overlooked the signs that wou…
By Candace Ganger

13 Unique (& Totally Not Mainstream) Mother's Day Gifts For The Hipster Mom

Hipsters thrive on being outside the norm and not really digging anything considered "mainstream." Whether it's in their fashion, what music they listen to, the books they read, or how they enjoy beverages, there's just something that makes them dist…
By Abi Berwager Schreier

Here's How To Introduce Your Pet To Your Baby & Make Everything As Calm As Possible

Our home, which we lovingly refer to as “the funny farm,” is filled with four-legged family members. We have two crazy beagles and two cat jerks, and boy are they loved and spoiled. (As they should be.) But we are now finally having a baby of our own…
By Abi Berwager Schreier

Here's The Right Birth Method For You, According To Your Zodiac Sign

If you're pregnant, you've probably given childbirth some serious thought. Some moms-to-be prepare a meticulous birth plan, while others are comfortable just going with the flow. And me? Well, I made a plan... but that plan was useless when faced wit…
By Steph Montgomery

My Dog Knew I Was Pregnant Before My Family Did

Growing up, I was 100 percent sure I'd be a mom one day. To a dog, that is. My baby plans came later. And once my husband and I were sure we wanted both a dog and a baby, we'd add to our joint dog-and-baby name list over Sunday brunch or on date nigh…
By Melissa Mills
)}