9 "Inappropriate" Questions Every Mom Wishes She Could Ask Her Partner

Ad failed to load

I’m so grateful to be married to the father of our kids, because I don’t think I could handle the parenting thing without live-in support. Though my husband and I don’t always agree on everything, at least there is someone who understands when I’ve reached my limit and need to put myself in a time-out before I explode. But for as much as we’re on the same parenting journey, I do wonder what my husband is thinking sometimes. If only I could ask my partner some of the inappropriate questions that pop into my head without him feeling offended or worried about my lucidity.

When you live with someone for as long as my husband and I have been together (married for 12 years, and living together for an additional two), you think you know each other extremely well. In some ways, I totally do know my husband both inside and out. I am aware of every food he doesn’t eat (all dairy and most vegetable products), what TV shows I should watch solo (anything without explosions or time travel), and that he sees no value in separating the dark from the light clothing when doing laundry. But there are things I wonder about myself — things I don’t have the answers to on this parenthood journey — that I’d like to get his perspective on.

Some of it is weird, though, so I don’t bring it up. And some of it is hella sarcastic, because even though he’s my parenting partner, there are times when I feel like I could save myself the hassle if it was all just left up to me.

Ad failed to load

So with all that in mind, here are some of those inappropriate questions I, as a mom, wish I could ask my partner:

Ad failed to load

"Do You Want To Revisit The Circumcision Thing?"


This is a ridiculous question. I know. We can’t undo our son’s circumcision. But I do wonder if, seven years later, my husband still feels like we made the right choice. Because while I won’t apologize for circumcising my son, I can’t say I feel great about it.

"Am I As Good A Mom As Your Mom?"

My husband’s mother was a saint, and now she’s an angel, having passed away five years ago. When I seethe and blow up at our kids, I can’t help but think that his mom would never exhibit that loss of control. So I guess I know the answer to this question already. Asking him might either cause him to lie to protect my feelings, or have me face the truth, which is that no one would ever be better than his own mother. Honestly, I can’t blame him for thinking that.

"Do You Ever Wish We Had Stopped After The First Kid?"


I have found myself admitting that it’s just so much damn easier when one kid is around while the other is at a sleepover or something. The ratio of two parents to one child stacks the deck in the parents’ favor, and that is a good thing (for me, as a parent). While I love both my children equally, and could never choose one over the other, the notion of having just one child does seem attractive at times, and especially when the kids are screaming and legitimately trying to kill each other.

Ad failed to load

"Do My Boobs Look Saggier To You?"

This is the post-kids version of: "Do these jeans make my butt look big in a bad way?” The changes to my body have been so gradual over the years, with two pregnancies and over four years of breastfeeding. Plus, I’m getting older, which naturally makes everything more susceptible to the effects of gravity.

I want to know, and I don’t want to know, if he notices.

"Would It Kill You To Memorize The Pediatrician’s Number?"


While my husband and I do try to evenly divide the tasks of parenting, I can’t help but think I do all the executive management of our family, which uses up a lot more brain space than, say, picking the kids up from soccer practice. I want my husband to have all the same contacts on speed dial as I do, including but not limited to: the doctor, the sitter, the school, the parents of their BFFs. He needs to be able to participate in the playdate scheduling sometimes, too.

I’m just annoyed that all the mundane scheduling tasks fall to me. I’d happily trade him some of that emotional labor for some of the manual labor he’s in charge of, like tightening the kitchen cabinet handles.

"Can You Wear That Anti-Snoring Mask Please?"

What I really mean to ask is: “Could you please do something about that snoring before I lose my mind?” My husband tells me he actually likes hearing me snore, because it means I’m peacefully asleep and that comforts him.

Whatever, dude. I do not feel that way. Ever.

Ad failed to load

"Does It Annoy You That I’m Always Right?"


I’m the worst, because I’m the best.

Actually, it’s a good thing I have a partner to keep my self-righteousness in check. Because I really do think I’m right, like, all of the time, and that’s probably impossible.

"Do You Ever Hate Our Kids?"

I hate myself for even thinking I could think it.

But the truth is, I’m a human first and a parent second (or maybe third, depending on how long my workday is on any given day). I have feelings, and they get hurt — often — by little children who are self-centered and blunt and know no gentle way to convey their emotions. So when they tell me they hate me, I can get pretty riled up. I’m learning to deal with being on an emotional roller coaster in response to my kids’ ever-evolving way they navigate the world as they develop their people skills. So while I love them fiercely, and will always, love them, I also have less kind feelings about how they are acting and I kind of want to know I’m not alone in that.

"Did You Really Find Me Beautiful When I Was Nine Months Pregnant?"


Honestly, I’m just digging for compliments. I did not feel beautiful when I was at my most pregnant. At least, I didn’t feel I was the epitome of the “conventional” version of beauty, as I had absorbed my whole life through images of cellulite-free women in the media.

Maybe I will go ahead and ask this one.

Check out Romper's new video series, Bearing The Motherload, where disagreeing parents from different sides of an issue sit down with a mediator and talk about how to support (and not judge) each other’s parenting perspectives. New episodes air Mondays on Facebook.  

Ad failed to load
Must Reads

11 Ways Your Pregnancy Will Be Different If You Have A Boy Vs A Girl

If you've been pregnant before, you might start comparing your previous pregnancies to that of your current pregnancy. A lot of things can change from pregnancy to pregnancy, based on a whole host of different factors (including how well you remember…
By Lauren Schumacker

How Having Kids In Your 20s Affects You Later In Life

For parents, like myself, who had kids in their 20s, there are a number of questions that come to mind. When you're deciding what your future will look like, you'll likely consider what this means for your health, career, and more down the line. Thin…
By Tessa Shull

35 Moms Share The Most Disgusting Things Their Husbands Do

I'm a human being who revels in challenges. I like when people present me with one, especially if they don't think I can meet or succeed it, and I like taking a challenge on, especially if it's unexpected. So when I aimed to uncover the most disgusti…
By Jamie Kenney

8 Reasons I Let My Toddler Play Outside Unsupervised

I'm not a helicopter mom, but I'm not exactly a free-range parent either. I like to think of myself as safely ensconced somewhere in the middle. I insist on certain safety measures, like car seats and helmets. I prefer to keep my 2-year-old in my sig…
By Kimmie Fink

12 Moms Share How They Stay Healthy During Flu Season

Unfortunately, we're in the middle of the roughest flu seasons in recent memory. And we’re not totally out of the woods, either. People around the country are still getting the flu, and, sadly, some of them are having to be hospitalized due to flu-re…
By Priscilla Blossom

Talk About Badass: These Olympic Athletes Competed While *Pregnant*

Pregnancy means different things for different people. For some of us, it means spending as much time on the couch binge watching bad reality TV and scarfing down burritos as possible (ahem). For others, it means performing record-breaking feats of s…
By Jacqueline Burt Cote

8 "Mistakes" I'm Glad I Made During My First Pregnancy

As an adult, I've learned you never really stop hating being told what to do. When I was pregnant I was getting instructions at every turn, from doctors, relatives, and complete strangers on the subway. I would nod and smile but then go about making …
By Liza Wyles

15 Moms Reveal The Most Disgusting Part Of Labor

When babies are born on TV, childbirth seems like such a neat and tidy process. When your water breaks it looks like a magical waterfall, and labor involves very little blood. Yeah, I'm sorry to say that the real deal is nothing like what you've seen…
By Steph Montgomery

8 Instant Pot Baby Food Recipes That Will Make Your Life So Much Easier

Introducing your baby to solid foods is always quite the adventure, but it might be easier than ever with the help of a super-popular kitchen appliance. In fact, recipes to make baby food in your Instant Pot just might change the way your think about…
By Lindsay E. Mack

A Surprising Number Of Babies Are Born On Valentine's Day — Is This Why?

Most of us have probably wondered if Valentine's Day might be up there on the list of top holidays for conceiving a baby, what with all the wine, chocolate and romantic dinners going on around the country. But would it surprise you to learn that Vale…
By Emily Westbrooks

People Can't Stop Talking About Kylie Jenner's Daughter's Nails & These Tweets Are So Hilarious

If you want to bring out the best (and worst) in people, just give them some big Kardashian or Jenner news. Although some people are already hating on Kylie Jenner's daughter's name, Stormi, other people were focused on something else entirely. On Tw…
By Karen Fratti

Study: Drinking Two Glasses Of Wine A Day Is Good For Your Mind — Here's Why

There’s more scientific proof that a daily drink or two isn't necessarily a bad thing and could have a place in an overall healthy lifestyle. A new study out of the University of Rochester Medical Center (URMC) in New York found that — in mice, at le…
By Tiffany Thomas

10 Conversations You *Must* Have With Your Midwife

One of the first, and arguably most important, decisions you'll make during your pregnancy is who your provider will be. Usually, that means a choice between an OB-GYN and midwife. If you go with the latter, you'll have some specific considerations (…
By Kimmie Fink

10 Reasons Why Being Pregnant In February Is Actually The Best

Last February I wrote a short treatise on why being pregnant in February is the worst. As that article made the rounds and people pitched in their two cents, I began to see arguments as to why maybe it's not all that bad. While I stand by my original…
By Jamie Kenney

Research Says Eating Carbs Can Lead To A Healthy Pregnancy, So Bring On The Pasta

In the world of me, no food is better than bread. I know it's supposed to be pretty terrible for you, high in calories, low in protein, and full of that modern-day demon, gluten... but guys, it's really yummy. Especially warm out of the oven, when th…
By Jen McGuire

Here's The Truth Behind One Of The Most Terrifying Old Wives' Tales About Pregnancy

Picture it: Massillon, Ohio, 1989. I'm but a wee thing visiting my grandmother at the single remaining five-and-dime shop where she worked. She and her friends allowed me to sit on the countertop eating lollipops and drinking fountain cola. A hugely …
By Cat Bowen

These Photos Of Prince George Then & Now Will Give You Serious Baby Fever

The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge are expecting their third child in Spring 2018. With all of the excitement surrounding the new baby, it's easy to forget all of the good times that have already passed. The couple's eldest is already well into the sc…
By Azure Hall

This Is, Hands Down, The *Grossest* Thing Babies Do Inside The Womb

Your baby's life in the womb may be safe and warm, but it's also kind of grody. Seriously, the whole process of growing into a human being includes more than a few icky moments along the way. But this is the grossest thing babies do inside the womb b…
By Lindsay E. Mack