Part of the thrill of dreaming about life post-delivery was imagining the precious scenes between your partner and your new baby: bonding over bottles, hiking with the baby carrier strapped on, your partner softly rocking your baby to sleep. But the reality has been much different than your dreams, and it seems like the baby wants nothing to do with anyone but you. You may be wondering, "what does it mean if my baby cries around my partner?" And if so, you're not alone.
Since mothers are usually the primary caregiver of an infant, especially in the first few months of life, babies can be extremely accustomed to having their needs met by her and her alone, Amanda Houle, child behaviorist and parent consultant in the Boston area tells Romper. According to Houle, it is perfectly normal for a baby in his first year of life to only have eyes for mom.
Psychology tells us that an infant's attachment to his mother is a vitally important thing, one that moms can and should feel proud of. But most mothers will tell you that as nice as it is to know you're doing a good job, it doesn't change the fact that a girl needs a break every now and then.
Houle emphasizes the importance of teaching your baby that other people in the world are trustworthy, too. Your partner is a great place to start. Houle warns that if you give in and take the baby back as soon as baby starts to fuss with the other parent, you're only creating a learned behavior that will take much longer to change.
According to Houle, the best way to help your baby learn to relax with your partner is by giving them the chance to do it. If you don't think you can stay in the house without swooping in to the rescue, whisper your best tips into your partner's ear and get out and run an errand.
Eventually, your partner will learn what works for them and the baby within their unique relationship, but it might be a bumpy ride as they figure it out together. The best thing you can do to move that process along is to get out of the way from time to time.