Romper

Crystal Henry

Crystal Henry, author of Naked Salsa and A Turtle's Tale, is a freelance writer glad to be back in her native Texas land. She is a University of Florida alumna who stays true to her Florida writing roots through her work with Our Town Magazine and her award-winning column, Naked Salsa. She is a boobs out breastfeeding advocate and semi-crunchy mom whose work has been featured on sites such as eHow, LIVESTRONG and ModernMom. Her world-domination-smart husband and two hilariously inappropriate little girls constantly provide fodder for her #preschoolproblems blog. But having two newborns of her own broke the baby fever that once burned deep within her. Instead she is renting out her oven to another woman's bun and documenting her surrogacy journey with humor and honesty through her blog, Her Eggs My Basket.
My Doctor Gave Me A "Husband Stitch," & I'll Never Forgive Him
The first year after my first baby was born was hard. It was sleepless nights, breastfeeding challenges, and trying to make sure I was fulfilling the needs of this tiny life I created. And although fulfilling needs was how we got here in the first…
'Tidying Up' & Throwing Away Is For Privileged Moms
My drawers were purged, reorganized and refolded within an hour of watching the first episode of Tidying Up With Marie Kondo, despite my reputation as a pack rat. And as I dug through and pitched t-shirt after t-shirt into my donation pile, I knew…
Yes, I Give Myself As Much Care As My Baby
People tell you that having a baby will change you, but until that baby drops, you have no idea what they mean. During my first pregnancy I followed all the rules — no caffeine, no lunch meat, and a daily throat-fisting of prenatal vitamins. Taking…
This Popular Piece Of Advice For New Parents Needs To Die In A Fire
My husband and I went to counseling to basically have a third party create a chore wheel for us. But while we were there, the therapist unearthed some deeply rooted problems we hadn't even discussed — one of which was our sex life. The advice to me…
Why Kim Kardashian's Surrogacy Experience Was Anything But "Easy"
It's a girl! Kim Kardashian and Kanye West announced the birth of Baby Girl West in the wee morning hours by surrogate, and as a former surrogate myself I know what a milestone this is for the entire team — no matter your feelings on the Kardashians…
I Bed-Shared As A Kid For A Tragic Reason, & I Turned Out Fine
One of the biggest struggles I had as a new mom was the guilt that washed over me when my child slept in my bed. I didn’t bed share because I thought it would strengthen our bond and I avoided it for a time because I was paranoid about SIDS, but I…
I Healed My Post-Baby "Belly Gap" With This Exercise, & I'm Telling Everyone
There is nothing sexy about my postpartum belly. No matter how many times my husband tells me he loves my new tummy because of "what it created" I will never accept this stretched, scarred and flabby aftermath of childbirth as "beautiful." What I…
We Do *Our* Version Of Elf On The Shelf, But Not For The Reason You Think
Ever since I realized that my breastfeeding "success" was as much luck as my sleep-training "failure," I refuse to get in a pissing match with other parents. Each winter when social media is flooded with Elf on the Shelf dread and elaborately staged…
Becoming A Surrogate Meant Having "The Talk" With My 5-Year-Old... & It Was Kind Of Awesome
The evolution of my body from itty-bitty-titty-committee president to full-blown menstrual mayhem was about a four-year process. I sprouted A cups in the fourth grade, but I chugged through puberty awkwardly for a few more glorious years until I got…
Why I'll Never Make My Daughter Wear A Dress
My childhood photos feature a perfectly posed child in a frilly dress, a bow in my carefully coiffed blonde hair. I still cringe when I think about the one with me in coiled spring curls, holding a parasol alongside my brother. The worst one,…
The Bikini That Saved Me Postpartum
Let’s be very, very honest about this — pregnancy and childbirth change your body. Regardless of what tabloid headlines about celebrities’ post-baby bodies and Instagram #fitspo posts might tell you, the reality is that your body’s going to look and…
I Tried Weaning With Band-Aids, & It Worked Like A Charm
I'd only intended to nurse my kids until they were a year old. I'd assumed that on their first birthday they'd seamlessly graduate to a sippy cup, and then I'd part ways with breastfeeding. But then a year came and went, and they were still nursing.…
I Was A Surrogate, & Here's What You Need To Know About What Kim K Just Went Through
On Wednesday, multiple news outlets reported that Kim Kardashian West and husband Kanye West have decided to have a third child via surrogate, due to Kardashian West's medical issues during her last pregnancy. Kardashian West suffered from placenta…
Breastfeeding Ruined My Sex Life
When you become a parent for the first time, it's normal to expect that your sex life to come to a bit of a grinding halt. After my first child barreled through my vagina, I fully expected that the visits to Pound Town would be few and far between.…
I Thought My Daughter Was Just Moody, But It Turns Out She Might Have PANDAS
My youngest daughter Violet was born with a smile on her face. She had a highly developed sense of humor at the ripe old age of 14 months, and for years, she would rise and shine every day with joy in her heart. But a few months ago, I noticed that…
I Think Daddy-Daughter Dates Celebrate Feminism
A few weeks ago, the story of a dad taking his daughter on dates went viral. The original poster said that her husband made a dinner date with their daughter, helped her pick out a dress, and took her out for a special evening. She said the result…
Trying To Be The Perfect Mom Meant My Kid Suffered
The kind of mother I thought I would be before I started growing a human and the mother I became in the first few sleepless weeks of motherhood are two totally different women. The transformation was hard, and I fought to hold on to the rules I’d…
I Tried To DIY Vintage Menstrual Gear On My Period
On the morning of President Trump’s inauguration my uterus revolted, and I started bleeding from my "wherever" five days sooner than I’d expected. I’d been following the Women’s March on Washington movement and it got me thinking about all that…
What Happened When I Tried To Hygge My Kids
The Danish lifestyle trend "hygge," which is pronounced "Hy-OO-Geh," is essentially the art of being cozy. Hygge aims to foster a sense of warmth and togetherness by encouraging people to slow down and appreciate the little things in life, such as…
I'm A Girl Scout Leader & I'm Marching For Women
It’s the 100-year anniversary of the Girl Scout cookie, but recently the girls made the news for more than their Thin Mints. After news broke that the Girl Scouts would be participating in the presidential inauguration parade, the internet quickly…