Romper

David Clover

David is a painter, writer, activist, queer, sometimes interfaith-lay-preacher, always animal-lover, and full time parent. He lives in beautiful Detroit, Michigan, with his wife, their baby, and three cats. His favorite food is graham cracker pie crust, and yes, that does count as a favorite food.

I Was Anxious Before Becoming A Parent — But Afterward Was Very Different

My heart was racing while I read and re-read the confusing car seat manual. My spouse offered to help and I snapped “I’m doing it!” I had planned to read the manual and even practice installing the stupid thing before the birth. I had also planned…
By David Clover

I Couldn't Afford A Second Baby, & This Is What I Spent My Money On Instead

The first time I floated (get it) the idea, my partner raised their eyebrows with skepticism. I'd been angling for baby number two off and on for a while, always with the caveat that we could (hypothetically) have a second child in the…
By David Clover

This Joke We Make About Trying To Conceive Is Archaic & Homophobic

When you reveal that you're trying to get pregnant, you'll get some kind wishes, while other people take the moment as an opportunity to launch into a well-worn comedy routine. If the person trying to conceive is a cisgender woman partnered with a…
By David Clover

We Never Talk About The Emotional Labor Of Pregnancy, & It Can Shatter You

Ah, pregnancy. There’s nothing quite as relaxing as gestating a fetus, your hair blowing in the wind while you stare off into the horizon, hand lovingly propped on your perfect baby bump. Oh wait, I’m describing a stock photo, whoops! Actual…
By David Clover

What It's Like To Lose Your Job After Having A Baby

When I got pregnant, I had a full-time job. It wasn’t an especially thrilling or lucrative job, but it made money which helped to pay our bills, and despite everything, I did enoy it. “I sell dog food for a living!” I would tell my friends with a…
By David Clover

I'm Queer, & I'm Terrified Of Being Stripped Of My Parental Rights

A few years ago, my wife and I sat in our tiny living room, hashing out plans for how to make a baby. As a same-sex couple, we had many decisions to make before becoming parents, decisions like “adoption or pregnancy?” and “who is going to carry?”…
By David Clover

I Refused To Admit I Had Prenatal Depression

When I was pregnant, a friend from out of town came for a visit. "Wow, you're glowing," she said when she saw me. "It seems like pregnancy is really agreeing with you." I cocked my head to the side, trying to think of the best way to respond. I…
By David Clover

I'm Sorry, But I'm Totally Judging Your Parenting

I'll admit it: before I had a child of my own, I was one of those people who judged parents. I'm not exactly proud of it, and I did my best to keep it to myself, but sure, I had some high and mighty ideas about raising kids. I always knew that once…
By David Clover

I'm Worried My Kid Will Inherit My Food Issues

Like a lot of adult women in the United States, I've had issues with food for as long as I can remember. I can’t really remember a time when I didn’t feel weird about food. I was a picky kid, so I was constantly at war with my parents to be allowed…
By David Clover

I Only Let My Kid Watch TV Shows That I Like

Like many first-time parents, I went into the adventure of parenting with many high and mighty ideals. And, just like almost every other parent in the known universe, I watched as, one by one, they fell by the wayside. It's true that it's much…
By David Clover

I Can't Mother Alone. There, I Said It.

It probably won’t come as any big shock to anyone reading that parenting can be kind of, well, hard. Kids are great. They're fun, smart, and exciting little people who are still pretty new to this whole “being a person” thing. But, at least for me,…
By David Clover

I Had No Idea Weaning Would Be Physical Hell

As a dedicated breastfeeding mom, I was in no hurry to wean my baby, so I didn’t put too much thought into how it would go when he did inevitably stop breastfeeding. Call me naive, but despite warnings from friends about the possibility of…
By David Clover

This Is Why I Didn't Stick To A Sleep Routine

In the days before I took the glorious and terrible plunge into motherhood, I heard all kinds of truisms about parenting, and many of them I believed. My mother was very fond of saying “kids need consistency” and she was more or less my parenting…
By David Clover

I'm A Mom Who Can't Afford To Strike

By now, you are probably aware that a whole bunch of ladies are striking on March 8 which is International Women’s Day, this year. As news of the strike gets around — dubbed "A Day Without a Woman" — the most common response I hear from friends,…
By David Clover

I'm Embarrassed By Own Lazy Parenting

The thing about having kids is that it is way more work to take care of a child than it is to not take care of a child. It isn’t that people without kids can’t and don’t work hard — they totally can and often do. It’s just that when you have a human…
By David Clover

The New Boy American Girl Doll Is Good For My Son

Growing up, I was really into dolls, and I was also a huge history nerd (I still am!) so naturally, the American Girl line of books and dolls was very appealing to me. My parents could never afford to get me the doll I wanted, but I devoured the…
By David Clover

My Lactation Consultant Saved Me When I Needed It

It may have been naive, but I didn’t really expect to have trouble breastfeeding before I gave birth. I’d planned to deliver in my home, with an awesome midwife and her team, and I figured that I’d trust my body and my baby and we’d figure out…
By David Clover

Betsy DeVos' Appointment Is A Danger To My Kid

I’m just going to go ahead and say it: I think Betsy DeVos was possibly the worst choice for Secretary of Education that could possibly have been made. That her nomination has now been confirmed (thanks to Mike Pence casting the tie-breaking vote)…
By David Clover

I'm Terrified Of What President Trump Will Do Next

I feel it would be an understatement to say that President Donald Trump and his administration have changed the American political landscape. Things have changed extremely rapidly since his inauguration on January 20 — he's signed a combined 18…
By David Clover

Here's The Big Problem With Daddy-Daughter "Dates"

Most parents love their kids, and would like to spend more quality time with them. It's recently become a bit of a "thing" for parents to take their kids out on platonic dates, which undoubtably allows for some special one on one time with the…
By David Clover