Saeed Adyani/Netflix

10 Parenting Lessons From Gilmore Girls That Have Stayed With Us

Lorelai was a young mom but she knew her stuff.


Lorelai Gilmore of the iconic series Gilmore Girls became a mom at 16. She was young, single, living in a new town. And yet she has become the gold standard for motherhood. Fierce, loyal, fallible. We can all learn so much from Lorelai. And yes, Emily too.


#1. Be Pals

Lorelai and Rory are friends. Yes, it can get complicated when setting boundaries (like when Rory didn’t want to go to Chilton), but ultimately what matters is for your kids to know you like them more than anybody.


#2. Always. Control. The. Pop Tarts.

To avoid being the mom who tries too hard, Lorelai has a solution. Remember who controls the Pop Tarts. If Rory slams her door or misbehaves, Lorelai controls the Pop Tarts. As Rory grows up, she’s in control of her own Pop Tarts.


#3. TV = Love

Lorelai and Rory have reputations around Stars Hollow as couch potatoes and for good reason. Their movie nights are one of the cornerstones of their relationship.


#4. Messing Up Is Perfectly Fine

Lorelai mistakes and owns them. She is fallible and makes mistakes, like sleeping with Christopher, that affect her daughter. But Rory is always ready to forgive. Especially when she’s reminded that nobody in this world is perfect.


#5. Hit The Road

Rory and Lorelai aren’t rich but somehow manage to go on amazing vacations. Backpacking around Europe, road trip to Harvard; these are the moments when moms get to back off a little and just enjoy their kid’s company.


#6. Give Grandma A Chance

Lorelai and her mom Emily have a tense relationship, but they have one thing in common; they adore Rory. She’s their common ground. Sometimes a grandma is a whole different person from a mom. So why not give that relationship a chance to thrive?

#7. Have Your Own Friends

Your kid can’t be your only friend. You need to have your own life, à la Lorelai and Sookie. Not only because you will need someone to vent to, it’s just too much pressure for your kid to be the only thing in your life. So sayeth Lorelai.


#8. No Butting Into Relationships

It’s hard to watch your kid get hurt and make mistakes named Logan, but they’re going to do it no matter what you say. Just trust that you did a good job and try to get through it.

#9. Traditions Matter

Holiday traditions are a big deal to the Gilmores. So much so that when Rory went to London for Christmas with Logan, Lorelai stopped Christmas for her. And as ridiculous as that sounds, kids love to know that there will be a sameness to their lives.

#10. They’re Going To Leave. Prepare.

Lorelai has to come to terms with the reality of Rory’s leaving at the end of Season 7. She is upset, but she has also made a life for herself. The Dragonfly Inn, her friends, Luke. Kids leave, and moms need to prepare to be themselves again.