By Anne Vorrasi
Ever wake up in the morning and have your to-do list rattling in your brain like some kind of song you can’t get out of your head? Well push it real good, baby, right onto this list. It’s not just any ol' list — it's stationary that will get you to chug your coffee, throw your hair in a bun, and make things happen.
For those days when you need to remind your children that you truly are a #boss, there’s the Question Authority Not Your Mother Tee from The Bee & The Fox. The designer, Ashley Jennett, is a photographer, RN, mom of three, and an all around creative spirit. For new mamas, her Shits & Giggles onesie is just what you & your baby need.
There are few things more homey than a cross stitch, but forget those cutesy sayings like “friends are forever” or “home is where the heart is.” No, you need something that really tells your family how you feel, like "Y’all Gonna Make Me Lose My Mind Up In Here, Up In Here." Grandma Char of Grammy Shop learned the art of cross stitching from her own grandma; she's a dental hygienist by day and a wizard with a needle and thread by night.
Anyone can ask for forgiveness in the best way possible with this apology card on Minted from mama Stacey Hill. Go ahead and grab a stack for your partner and leave them on their bedside table along with a working pen. You know, just in case.
Looking for the perfect baby shower gift or push present? This First Mommy Meltdown wine bag from mama behind Tutu Cute by Kristina will give your friends a good laugh. And consider yourself their absolute favorite person in the world when those baby blues hit and they know there’s a great bottle of rosé just waiting for them.
If your sibling didn’t tell you that you were an accident or adopted throughout your childhood, are they really even your sibling? This brutally honest and hilarious stationary from Chelsea of Simply Said Paper Co. will remind them that you were (and always will be) the favorite. Her two young sons will probably find themselves stocking up on these one day.
If you want to keep your cool status as you sip on your fancy green tea — or, let's be honest, your cold cup of coffee — you'll need this hilarious mug from maker Lorrie Veasey of Lenny Mud. She's a mom with two kids (whom she endearingly refers to as "the spawn"), and Lenny Mud is actually the name of her studio cat, who has has a habit of breaking her creations.
No matter how many kids you have, this sign from Dingbats & Doodles (run by a SAHM of two teenage daughters, Kimmie Young) can be customized so everyone who enters your home knows exactly why your sanity is hanging by a thread. And trust, you're not alone.
Remember all those baby bump updates you got while you were pregnant and how you couldn’t wait for the one that said “your baby is now the size of a watermelon”? (Nevermind wondering how you were going to get that watermelon out.) Now you can reminisce with your actual baby in this adorable swaddle sack from Hanley Crest, run by mama Cecelia and her mother-in-law, Caryl.
This funny sign from Crabapple Design Co is just straight up true — if you haven't watched Baby Cobra yet, you need to hear what Ali Wong has to say about this very subject. The mom-and-dad duo behind Crabapple Design Co exercise their creative muscles after their kids go to bed to collaborate on decorative pieces for the home, and your bathroom is just waiting for this one.
Who says kids are the only ones who need a sippy cup? This intended-for-moms version is the perfect stemless wine glass from Lisa, mother of three, of Stampout Online. It’s a generous 15 ounces, which means fewer trips to the fridge for refills for you. Motherhood: it's all about efficiency.
This hilarious a baby journal from Raquel D'Apice — comedian, mom of two, author of Welcome to the Club, and blogger behind The Ugly Volvo — is one you’ll actually use thanks to prompts that encourage you to write about the batsh*t crazy things that happen on your parenting journey. Besides, how else are you going to remember all the ridiculous things you and your baby did so that you can embarrass your child well into their adult years?
Before you became a mom, you didn't know you'd one day be totally obsessed with a pint-sized version of yourself’s farts. Now you need this tool that literally helps your baby rip one. It’s a glorious invention to give you a glorious sound when your child is gloriously fussy, and it's gloriously funny. You can thank mom of two (soon to be three) Chelsea Hirschhorn for it.
Dress your baby up as your favorite condiment because you can. Mom Amy Kuhn designed an outfit set that wins as everyday wear and is cute enough to work as a Halloween costume, too.
There’s a reason why whine and wine rhyme, you guys, and every mom knows it. This cute tee from The Top Tees on Etsy (run by SAHM Sarah Thompson) will share your coping mechanism with the world — you’ll probably even get a few fellow moms of whiners salute you.
All those sappy, sugary sweet cards meant are getting sidelined for something you (or someone you know) actually want to say. Thank you, Katie, mom behind Hurrah For Gin Prints, for helping us get our message across with this hilarious card.