June Diane Raphael Believes In The Confidence-Boosting Power Of Failure

When June Diane Raphael calls me from her car shortly after 7 p.m., I pick up half expecting to hear Brianna Hanson, the hilarious ice queen CEO she plays on Netflix’s hit series Grace and Frankie. What I hear instead is the voice of a mother who’s eagerly heading home to spend time with her two sons after a long day on set. To my surprise though, Raphael doesn’t sound the least bit tired. She’s excited to tell me about her latest venture as founder of The Jane Club, a first-of-its-kind co-working space that provides resources and various means of mental support to mothers all over the world.

“One of the things that saved me most during motherhood was the amazing women in my life who stepped in to take care of me, so that’s really where the idea for The Jane Club came from,” she says. “We started out as a co-working space in Los Angeles where we provided full-time childcare, and then when the pandemic hit in March, we quickly pivoted to creating an online community where women come together every single day for live gatherings, social connections, and self-care. We have everything from daily meditations, to classes on racial justice, to book clubs, cocktail hours, and more.”

Making the decision to move forward with The Jane Club after stay-at-home orders were put in place wasn’t an easy one — and yet, Raphael took the risk anyway. It was her passion, which means it was worth the risk even if she failed. And that’s exactly what this conversation, in partnership with European Wax Center, is about.

Before having kids, Raphael admits she wasn’t always as confident or fearless. In fact, like for many of us, the mere idea of failing scared the living hell out of her. For instance, she tells me about a time earlier in her career when she and her writing partner almost didn’t get to see their indie film, Ass Backwards, come to life due to budget reasons. “After one of our financiers dropped out and checks started bouncing, we spent two years raising money to finish the movie again,” she says. “I thought we might never finish it and spent every night of that time in a full panic, but we did end up finishing it, and the film got into Sundance in 2012.”

Ultimately, it’s been setbacks like this that have taught Raphael the importance of failure as a catalyst for growth. This lesson is one she hopes to instill in her two sons, Sam and August, who are both under ten. “My kids look at me, and I’m like God to them, and that’s a lot of power, so I think it’s really important to show them that you can make mistakes and that you can fail, and that it’s perfectly OK,” she says. “Every single day, I lose my temper or come down harder than I mean to, but then I apologize — not only for my own sanity but because I want to model for them what that looks like. Especially living in a culture that’s so quick to dismiss people, I think it’s important for them to see that parents are human too, and that we can all build a capacity to forgive each other and forgive ourselves.”

Being candid and vulnerable with her kids has made Raphael more confident and open to taking new chances in life, both personally and professionally. “Becoming a mother has definitely made me more fearless,” she says. “I’m not as scared of failure and am more willing to take risks, because, at the end of the day, I get to come home to two little faces who think I’m awesome, so what is there to be scared of?”

Learning to let go of her fears and embrace imperfection is what ultimately gave Raphael the courage to finally turn her dream for The Jane Club into a reality. “I really like to force myself to take more uncomfortable risks now, and The Jane Club has definitely been a big one,” she says. “The alternative is to sit with the possibility that something could’ve been great, so I’m always going to risk it, and if it doesn’t end work out, that’s OK.”

So far though, The Jane Club is proving highly successful — even despite the COVID-19 crisis that’s upended our world and any sense of normalcy this year. “I’m really proud of how we’re managing to thrive in the midst of the pandemic and economic downturn,” Raphael tells me. “We pivoted immediately into a digital community out of necessity and now have Janes in over 35 states and four countries who come to us every day to connect, grieve, laugh, and learn. It’s been truly remarkable.”

As we wrap up our conversation, Raphael lays one last piece of wisdom on me, and well, I think it’s advice we should all try to remember as we move through this crazy rollercoaster called life:

When it comes down to it, people don’t learn from things going well. We don’t learn from the good times. We learn from the bad times. We learn from ourselves and what we can withstand. I know how hard it can be to embrace failure, but at the same time, I also feel that my greatest lessons have come from those moments where I’ve felt most hopeless. So just remember: It’s never too late to pick yourself up and start again.

Click below to watch the video of Raphael from her Romper photo shoot.

This post is sponsored by European Wax Center.

Photographer: Chris Ozer; Makeup Artist: Melissa Sandora; Hair Stylist: Michael Anton; Wardrobe Stylist: Abby Arad; Art Director: Molly Kugelmann; Production Lead: Kelsey Dimitruk; Branded Beauty Lead: Lexi Novak