As far as you're concerned, your sex life is on point and satisfying. But unless the lines of communication are totally open, you may be falling into some bad habits you don't realize annoy your partner in bed. Let's face it, no one likes to have their sex game criticized or critiqued — or be the one handing out the bad review. So it's possible your partner has been putting up with some irritating tendencies that you may not even realize you have. But the longer your other half bites their tongue the more the aggravation will build around these issues.
In order for sex to be awesome for both people, awareness and honesty is needed. Whether that means expressing what you want in bed, asking your partner what turns them on, or making a point to regularly get it on, no matter your weekly schedule, keeping your sex life healthy requires effort from both parties. This also means checking in not just with your SO, but with yourself to see if you've slipped into some unintentional patterns that are causing the wrong kind of tension between the sheets. To keep the sparks flying, check to see if you've fallen into any of these annoying bedroom habits that can make your partner frustrated.
1. You Stick To The Same Position
There's no shame in having a fave position, but doing it the same way every time can feel more like a choreographed routine than an intimate moment. As marriage consultant and coach Lesli Doares told Glamour magazine, "different positions feel different for each of you so be willing to experiment on occasion."
2. You Have Dinner Breath
Unlike the power of pheromones, notes of roasted red pepper hummus lingering on your breath can make your partner focus less on sex and more on holding their breath. Before you get pulled into the heat of the moment, scrub those teeth, swirl some mouthwash, or pop a mint to keep the make out session enjoyable for both of you.
3. You Hate On Your Body
Sure, you strive for full body acceptance, but most people have at least one picky thing about their body that can stir up some insecurities. But pointing this out in bed does nothing to up the mojo factor. Try spending more time naked to gain confidence and a higher comfort level with your body, as Cosmopolitan magazine suggested.
4. You Do It In The Dark
Do you need the room to be completely blacked out before you can get it on? If so, your partner is probably developing a very active imagination about what your body looks like. Remember that your SO likes having sex with you and enjoying your body, so turn on the lights and watch the sparks fly. (Or at least light a few candles for soft lighting to start.)
5. You Yawn
Not getting enough sleep makes you feel sluggish and frazzled, but the lack of Zs can effect your sex life as well. According to Everyday Health, lack of sleep can lower your sex drive and affect the hormones that fuel your sexual arousal. Your partner will be annoyed if you can't stop yawning while getting busy — it makes them feel like you're less into it, and possibly less into them as well.
6. You Speed Through Foreplay
Rushing through foreplay to get to the finish line may seem like a logical route to take when you're hungry for an O, but aside from annoying your partner, this habit is counterproductive. As True Love magazine explained, "rushing foreplay reduces your chance of climaxing."
7. You Bring Electronics Into The Bed
And not the fun kind. Swiping and scrolling might feel like a good way to unwind, but connecting with your partner and keeping the spark alive is good for your relationship and fosters connection.
8. You've Had Too Many Cocktails
It's true you may feel a little more in the mood after a couple of drinks, but knowing when to say "stop" could up your bedroom performance. As Prevention pointed out, too much alcohol causes the inability to orgasm, which means your partner can wear themselves out trying to get you to the point of climax (that never happens). All this work for no results can be super annoying if it becomes a habit.
9. You Don't Initiate Sex
Even if it's out of your comfort zone, you should make an effort to initiate sex every now and then. It can be aggravating to your partner to always be the one putting the moves on. Even sending a saucy text can get the party started and help your partner to feel desirable.
10. You Don't Say They're Hot
Sure, you may think that sex with your partner is super hot, but saying it out loud makes a big difference. As relationship expert April Massini told Glamour, even mentioning how good sex was the next day can go a long way with your partner.
11. You Fake Orgasms
You may think you have your partner fooled, but most people are pretty good at spotting a fake orgasm. Doing this leave your feeling unsatisfied and your partner annoyed that you don't just share what you like/need to get that O you deserve.