If you're like me, you can't keep up with the ever-evolving world of slang that our society seems to pummel through at lightning speed. It seems like as soon as I figure out how to use "snatched" properly in a sentence (turns out it's got the same meaning as "on fleek"), it's on to the next word. Which is why I'm turning to vintage language. I mean, aside from my mild obsession with decades of the past, their slang was just... the most. (See what I did there?) There are a number of obscure old phrases we need to bring back. Not just because they're fun to say, but because I need some old standards to rely on in this world of super-charged changing slang.
There's no reason to go off your chump or flub the dub, just live a little, feel like a bearcat for once. And if you can't cut the mustard, or people look at you like you're a hugger-mugger, just remember whoever thinks you're off your cob is nothing but a mumpsimus. So don't be a beef-witted dewdropper, fold yourself in four and give them the wind! If all else fails, you can get zozzled with your pals and have a chat about fribblers. Whew. Keep reading to translate all of that epic old time slang.