29 Funny Parenting Tweets From Twitter's Most Hysterical Parents


They say what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, and this statement most certainly rings true when it comes to raising a toddler. After you've fished a Barbie doll out of the toilet and successfully cleaned the maple syrup out of your 6-year-old's hair minutes before her soccer game began, there's pretty much nothing you can't handle. Being a parent is basically like being a superhero but without receiving any of the praise or adoration. It's a ton of work and requires putting yourself through endless sticky situations, as made clear through this week's round-up of funniest parenting tweets.

Your life is no doubt fueled by 15 minute naps and countless cups of coffee, and the last time you've had a solid night of sleep was probably around three years ago. All of your shirts are most likely stained in one way or another and you're pretty sure the weird rash you've developed on your back is stress-induced. Yes, you're exhausted, but being a parent pretty much ensures that you'll never live a day without any laughter or excitement. Sometimes it takes hearing or reading about other parents' struggles to remind yourself that it's definitely okay to laugh at your parenting woes sometimes.

1If Only

I'd be unstoppable.

2Toddler Logic

No, legos do not belong in the refrigerator.

3100 Percent Required

It's absolutely necessary.


Can you blame them?

5Parenting Goals

Sounds like pretty good advice to me.

6Get Me Out Of Here

Sounds like a blast!

7Please Don't Find Me


8Trader Joe's, My Second Home

This is probably the most "mom" statement I've ever read.

9No More Whining, Please

And by "today," I think you really mean "every day."


The absolute worst.

11Joke's On You

And I'm pretty sure it's Greek for "your shirt is stained with throw up."

12A Dangerous Mission

You are so, so brave.


What a coincidence! We have the exact same hobbies.

14100 Percent Accurate

It's like a ticking time bomb.

15Shut Your Mouth

The golden rule: Never accept parenting advice from somebody who does not have kids.


Sounds about right.

17No More Cartwheels, Please

You'd think they'd get tired after the first 50 somersaults. But nope.

18Who Needs Hawaii?

What's the point of vacation if you can yell at your kids from the comfort of your own living room?

19You're Blocking My View

Those still sound like pretty big dreams to me.

20How Could You?

Rookie mistake.

21Couldn't Agree More


22World-Renowned Author

I heard it was on The New York Times best seller list.

23No Shower, No Problem

She definitely will.

24Dinnertime Drama

I'm praying for the day my toddler will eat something other than Spongebob macaroni and cheese.

25The Struggle Is Real

Those were the days.

26254 Milliseconds Left

It's an acquired skill.

27Can't Argue With That

Sounds pretty logical to me.

28No Kids Allowed

I don't blame her.

29Please Be Careful

Making ginormous messes is pretty much a prerequisite to being a kid.