My son just turned 5 and we're finally at the tail end of the potty training process. We started prematurely and it didn't take but, once he decided he was ready, things went a lot smoother. However, it is still a gross process. Like, really gross. This is why some of the smallest acts are the biggest turn-ons for someone like me. In fact, it turn out the erotic things you could do for a mom currently potty training her toddler are endless, but my tops favs are below (and totally on point with where we're at in his process).
The first time I dipped my toes in the potty training pool, it was with my daughter. She was just over 2 at the time, but my partner and I felt she was ready. Looking back and remembering at all the frustration, it's pretty obvious she wasn't. Eventually, things fell into place but, once I had my son, I knew I wouldn't push so hard and that it would happen when it was meant to happen. After a failed potty-training attempt when my son was a bit younger, I took the laid back approach in hopes he would let me know by his maturity that he was ready.
So now, here we are: down to just those dreaded night-time pull-ups. So close an yet so, so far away. With that, here are some of the incredibly erotic things you can do for this, or any other, mom going through the glory that is getting your kid not peeing his, or her, pants.
Buy A Pack Of Diapers Or Pull-Ups
The thing about potty training most don't realize is, just as when the kid is a baby, we go through a ton of pull-ups. Accidents happen! They're not cheap, either. If you really want to do something romantic or erotic for a tired mom, you'll happily buy a pack of diapers or pull-ups and maybe even throw in a bag of chocolates and stickers to use as rewards. It takes a village to potty train a child, am I right?
Offer To Clean Up The Mess
This sh*t gets tiring, especially when you have more than one child to tend to. My daughter used to be so delicate and clean (not anymore, mind you) while my son, bless his soul, can't figure out how to properly use toilet paper and get it inside the toilet.
Some days, I dry heave my way through whatever happened in the bathroom so if you were to, I don't know, offer to wipe things down, it would literally be the sexiest thing ever.
Compliment Her Skills
I never feel like I'm doing things right. Part of that comes with working from home and being the primary caregiver. I'm always here which means it's easier to notice the fails. You know what's hot? When someone says "You are killing this potty training thing!" Or "No on will ever be as good at wiping butts as you are right now!" They don't even have to be true; if I hear them, I will melt.
Be The Wiper
Speaking of wiping, could you? Seriously. Because sometimes, I just don't wanna.
When my little boy sits down, I always have hope it won't be as messy as last time (why is it so damn messy though?) and every time, I am wrong. Even when he does everything right, the wiping ruins it. There's nothing more erotic than a partner who volunteers before I get the chance to do it. Nothing.
Bring Her Presents
Being a mom means, I'm usually the last person to receive anything. I'm in charge of buying all the potty-training stuff, I do all the actual training, and yet, I don't get a sticker or cool toy for making it through the week (I wish). You want to do something to catch the attention of a mom going through it? Bring her a candy bar. Buy her a bottle of wine. Make sure she knows she's doing a great job and deserve a little something. I promise it won't go unnoticed. Wink wink.