I lost my virginity at an age that shall remain undisclosed, but let's just say I was old enough to be ready physically, not quite ready emotionally, have certain expectations thanks to the movies. What I didn't expect? A lack of real pleasure. And this minimal pleasure continued for quite some time. Years later, when I had sex with my would-be-husband, it was damn near perfect. And though I couldn't pinpoint it then, I realized it was so good because your sex life gets better as you get older.
And I'm not the only one who feels that way. The National Over-45's Sex Survey revealed that 60 percent of people over the age of 40 reported enjoying the a romp in the hay more now than ever. Live Science reported on a survey where women claim their sex lives are better after 40; they simply cite increased sexual satisfaction as they age.
With time comes carnal knowledge, and true pleasure. Growing into your most passionate sexual self involves a little magic ( the right chemistry ), confidence ( ask for what you want ), and hormones ( increasing your sex drive ). There's a lot to love about sex as you age, and here are just some of the highlights.
1. You Know What You Want
Sex in your 20's is a wide open door of possibilities. You're trying different sex positions and may even experiment with same-sex sex partners. And that's totally OK: how else are you going to find out what you like? But when you're done testing the sexual waters and finally discovers what turns you on, your sexual satisfaction increases immensely.
2. You're More Confident
Insecurities about your body or your sexual charisma have faded or been worked out completely, and you are empowered to enjoy sex free of anxious thoughts.
3. You Have A Higher Sex Drive
A study from the University of Texas found that women in their 30s and 40s are significantly more sexual than young women, reporting that they have more sexual fantasies and sex in general.
4. Your Orgasms Get Better
Healthy Women writes that "as women age, their orgasms can become longer, more frequent, and even more intensely satisfying." Science Says noted that Dr. Hendrick, Ph.D., agreed, saying, "orgasm becomes easier with age. "
5. Intimacy Incereases Satisfaction
Although sex can be hot and heavy with a perfect stranger, over time, as intimacy between a couple intensifies, and so does the sex. In The Institute For Family Studies, Jason S. Carrlos, Ph.D. who studies intimate relationships, stated that loving and lasting marriages are ones where the sexual intimacy is a meaningful physical symbol of the emotional intimacy shared between spouses."
For me, this has absolutely been true. As my marriage deepened, our sex life became not only physically intense – fireworks –but emotionally intense, and when those two merge, it's like falling in love all over again every time.
Images: Courtesy of See-Ming Lee/Flickr; Giphy (5)