The transition to motherhood is dramatic and life-altering. Though in theory you’ve had months to prepare, when you are suddenly thrust into the role and find yourself solely responsible for another human being, it can be a bit isolating and even borderline terrifying. In past civilizations, you’d have simply turned to the other women in your community for help and support during difficult times. But now, more women are waiting longer to have kids, if they have them at all, which means that if you do drop a shorty, you're more likely than ever to not be surrounded by a ton of experienced moms to help you navigate this whole mess.
Because as awesome as they are, your childless friends have little to offer in terms of understanding and encouragement. It’s not that they don’t have your back—they do! But especially during the early parts of parenting, when there’s not as much time for the non-mom parts of your life (which do come back eventually), you have less in common with your child-free buddies—and more need than ever to have people around you who not only care about you, but can actually relate to some degree to what you’re going through.
This isn’t to say that once you have kids, you should only be friends with people who have kids. That is… a thoroughly insane and depressing thought. You should obviously still be friends with the same friends you had pre-baby. That said, you’re going to need some mom friends. You just do. Don’t argue. Just do it. Find some. For the sake of your sanity, it is imperative to begin building a mom squad immediately.
Now, the composition of your mom squad is crucial: It needs to be composed of other women who are serving in the trenches just like you. They will be your buddies. Your comrades. Whether they are veteran moms, or newbies like you, they will understandthe struggles of parenthood. They will identify with the dark circles that have permanently taken residence under your eyes, and they won’t judge the baby puke that is plastered to the maternity pants you still wear.
These women will be your lifeline. They will go to bat for you. When that vapid, child of a Starbucks barista smiles knowingly at your belly and asks when you’re due, while you hold your 6-week-old baby, these are the women that will slosh that iced pomegranate chai tea in her face. You want them in your corner. In fact, on some days, you honestly won’t remember how you survived without them.
But not all moms are created equally. There are some that are simply a notch above the rest. Here are the 5 best women to recruit into your own mini mommy mafia.