When I was approaching the final weeks of pregnancy, my partner and I had pretty much accepted the fact that the first few months of our kids life were going to be a hot mess. Not to say that our kid's life would be a hot mess, but our lives would be as they adjusted to orbiting around a brand new central object — our baby. Of course, we resolved to do our very best and to make it through that mess, no matter how hot it might get, but thanks to advice from our friends and family, media portrayals of new parents, and well, common sense, we knew our world was going to be turned upside down.
And the thing is, there was only so much we could do to prepare. Sure, our nursery was painted and stocked with burp clothes and blankets; the bassinet was set up next to our bed; the hospital bag was packed. But a real sense of what it was going to feel like? What was going to happen to our time, our energy, our sleep, our priorities? Yeah, no. We had no clue. There’s no way to really have a clue. Like any venture into the unknown, you can do all the research in the world, and equip yourself with everything you think you’re going to need, and talk to people who’ve been there before you, but when it comes down to it, what your journey will be like, and the way your particular body and brain will react to the experience? Those are things you simply can’t know until you’re already past the point of no return. It’s as thrilling as it is terrifying.
The good news is, we made it through. And, it’s true what they say: We’re totally enjoying parenting more with each month that goes by. Though, for the sake of all the other new parents out there staring at the door of their yet-to-be-filled nursery, I’m revisiting some of the feelings I had in those first weeks at home. You’re not alone, friends. Here’s where my head and heart were.