Pregnancy is a true test of a relationship. Rogue hormones mixed with growing pains, discomfort, morning sickness, and hypertension left me feeling less like myself and more angry at my partner. I don't think I'm alone in this "blame your partner when you're pregnant" experience, either. Growing humans is hard, and sometimes you just need someone to channel your frustrations towards. In fact, I'd go so far as to say there are moments during pregnancy when you'll want to yell at your partner and burn the world down without remorse or apology. I'm sure of it.
Both my full-term pregnancies were stressful. The first was a surprise and happened early on in our relationship. My partner's family wasn't all that thrilled when we announced the pregnancy, and I had hypertension that made standing up or walking around nearly impossible. So, yeah, I spent 40 weeks (more or less) feeling pretty damn grumpy. My second pregnancy was also a surprise, but only because my partner and I had been trying to get pregnant for years and only had two miscarriages to show for it. So my pregnancy was labeled high-risk immediately and that, too, made me grumpy and frightened.
Through both of those pregnancies I could lose my cool in a nano-second and, honestly, when I did my partner was on the receiving end of my frustrations. So with that in mind, here are some moments you'll also want to unleash your pregnant wrath on the person who's supporting you through the difficult task of growing another human being inside your body. Hey, I don't advocate you being abusive or toxic towards your partner, in any way, but helping you navigate your emotions and being an outlet during the difficult parts of pregnancy is, um, kind of their job. You're growing limbs inside your womb. They can deal with an outburst or two or, well, when they do this kind of stuff:
When They Rearrange Things
Nesting can happen at any point in the pregnancy. It comes on suddenly, and once I get things in the right places, I don't want anyone messing with my handiwork. My partner never meant to "mess" anything up, but anytime I'd finally moved a stack of new onesies to a specific place that felt right to me, he'd search through them for some ungodly reason and, yes, I'd scream my lungs out. Leave my piles alone.
When You Hurt Everywhere
I've never hurt more than during pregnancy. Every part of my body was just uncomfortable. I mean, my toes hurt. And when I was swollen, aching, dealing with heartburn, and peeing every two seconds, my temper was short. Towards the end, when walking was torturous, I could've burned the world down if someone simply looked at me wrong.
When They're Eating & You Have Morning Sickness
If your partner insists on eating all the foods around you while you're hovering over a toilet rim, you have every right to rage! I had ridiculous morning sickness when I was pregnant with my daughter, and every time my partner microwaved something that wafted in my direction, I could've ripped the thing out of the wall with my bare hands.
When They Have A Drink
My partner knew I couldn't have a beer until after I safely delivered our baby, but did the requests to go out stop? Nope. Did he save his drinking time for when I wasn't home (or in a better mood)? No! Is it too much to ask for him to stop drinking until I can? Maybe, but still.
When They're Putting Furniture Together
There's something about putting obscure furniture together (i.e. a bounce castle that can't be used for a couple years because a newborn can't even hold their heads up, you guys) that really brings out the pregnancy rage. Why are we doing this right now?
And then there's the moment when your partner grows frustrated while assembling the crib, so you get frustrated watching them assemble the crib.
When You Want To Watch Your Shows & They Change The Channel
Never, ever, do this to your pregnant partner. Ever.
When Hormones Make You Angry For No Reason
Some days, it didn't matter what my partner did or didn't do — he was in for it. You can't help your mood when those damn pregnancy hormones start to surge. Maybe I'm sorry I yelled so much and maybe I wish I didn't want to burn the world down all those times, but I'd like to think I was justified because I was growing a freaking human in my body.
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