Late in the summer of 2014, I had a severe mental breakdown. It didn't come out of nowhere and there was no way to stop it. After all was said and done, I remember looking to my partner for some sort of revelation or insight. What happened, instead, was me trying to dig my way out of this massive hole, alone. He didn't say (or do) all the things every grown-ass man says when hearing "I think I should see a therapist" but, in retrospect, I understand he didn't necessarily have the tools or know-how to say or do much of anything.
I've endured bouts of depression and anxiety before and, from a young age well in my adult years, was diagnosed with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), Generalized Anxiety (GAD), and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). When I think back to my childhood, which was often filled with turbulence and instability, it all makes sense. Complications with mental health throughout my adult life has been a real struggle that I'm always trying to navigate, so it's understandable (when this happened on that sunny September evening) that no one knew how to help me. I mean, I didn't even know how to help me.
I've been going to different therapists for many years, but had taken a hiatus sometime around the birth of my son. I thought I was doing well enough and coping, but it turns out I'd only suppressed a whole mess of things that would — you guessed it — claw their way back out of me at some point. On that day, when the world shifted so slowly and so quickly all at once, I knew it was time to get help again. Only this time, it was far more dire than in years' past.
Even if you've never had something so life-altering, you know when your own coping mechanisms no longer work and maybe, probably, it's time to see a therapist so you can work through whatever is plaguing you. Here are some things every grown-ass man says when you confide in him because, if my partner had said any of this that night as I sobbed on the floor, I might've healed that much faster.