7 Things That Happen When You're The First Of Your Friends To Have Kids
I’m sure there are plenty of groups of 20-something friends out there in the world who all have kids relatively young and go through the experience together. I’m somewhat jealous of this. It’s completely different from what I and so many other 20-somethings experienced. When I got pregnant a few weeks before my 25th birthday, not only did none of my friends have children, the very idea of procreating felt like something we had all unspokenly agreed to do in the far, far future. I had a few random friends and acquaintances here and there who were married or headed in that direction, but even that was a rare leap into adulthood. I was (and largely still am) a part of a social network full of people who have proudly, intentionally set aside their 20s (and maybe even most of their 30s) to focus entirely on themselves, their careers, and building their lives before even thinking about kids (and that's if they plan to have kids at all, which many of them don't, and ours is a social environments that not only fully accepts that, but might even respect and prefer it more).
So when I got pregnant, it was a mildly radical departure from the shared path my friends and I had been on together for so long. A few years later, I’m still hanging onto my 20s (take your time, 29), and my friends and I have had endless fun having my kid as part of our lives. That said, there are unavoidably some unique ways in which your relationships with your friends will be altered by your detour to parenthood. Not all of these changes are wholly good, nor are they completely negative. Things just… change. This is how that change looks when you’re the first of your friends to get babied up.