Most of the time, I love parenting alongside my partner. I love talking about the latest new thing our daughter discovered, and I love cracking up over her antics together. Plus, I love the sense of pride we both have in the fact that she's growing and we're molding her into a pretty great tiny human. However, that doesn't mean I love every minute of every day. There are some parenting things no one actually likes doing with their partner, and those things usually make you sigh and say something along the lines of, "How is this my life right now?" before calculating the minutes until bedtime.
No one said parenting was easy, and I don't think very many parents go into it thinking it's going to be "smooth sailing," or that their relationship (if it is, in fact, two romantic partners parenting together) won't be impacted in some way. Still, until you're actually a parent yourself and you're in the trenches of late-night feedings, diaper changes, playdates, and the like, you really can't know what it's like to have someone by your side that sometimes annoys you but who you're ultimately (usually) extremely thankful for.
So, with that and because parenthood is about more than simply celebrating the wins, here are a few parenting things no one (myself included) likes doing with their partner.
Dealing With Poop In The Tub
What the heck is with babies and toddlers who think pooping in the tub is just a super idea?! I have to say, cleaning up the aftermath is quickly becoming my least favorite thing to do with my partner, although I have to say having a second set of hands there to deal with sopping toddler who can't understand why she has to get out of the tub, and the actual problem itself, can be useful. Just totally not enjoyable.
When I picked my daughter up at daycare the other day, her teacher suggested she might be getting close to ready to potty train. When I told my partner that daycare had suggested letting her watch me pee and sitting her on her potty every time, we both groaned. And then he laughed at me until I reminded him what would happen when we had a boy to potty train eventually.
Air travel is another one of those parenting things where it's useful and sometimes necessary to have your partner by your side, but boy is it a miserable thing to have to do together. Air travel is one of the most uncivilized luxuries, made less civilized only with the introduction of children. No one is their best self on an airplane and having a wiggling toddler bounce between your laps doesn't make you a better version of yourself.
Having a sick kid makes my stress levels rise really quickly, and by the time the sickness has elevated enough to warrant a trip to the doctor, I'm ready mama bear myself right into a bunker and not come out until my baby is well. Having two adults with high worry levels in a tiny room waiting for what seems like eternity for the doctor to tell you it's a virus and you'll have to wait for it to pass, sounds like a particular kind of hell I would rather not experience.
Making Parenting Compromises
My husband and I differ, as most couples do, in some areas of our parenting philosophy. I'm generally anti-screens unless we're FaceTiming grandparents, but my husband isn't so rabid about it. Some days it seems it would just be easier not to have to make those compromises with my partner. And yet, at the end of the day, I know it's good for me and for our daughter that someone is around to temper my nuttiness.
Cleaning Big Baby Messes
Especially the goo that seems to permanently reside under my toddler's high chair. There's something about being on my hands and knees scrubbing banana goo that makes me fume that he's not doing the same. Despite the fact that he likely did it last time, it's still just so annoying.
Dealing With Clingy Toddlers
We're in the phase with our daughter where she's starting to play favorites between my partner and I, and this happens much more when she's tired. It's especially frustrating to be trying to make dinner and my daughter will only cling onto my neck, not my husband's, despite the fact that he's standing ten feet away. Or when I'm trying to get our daughter into her car seat and she's screaming "Dada! Dada!" at him in the front seat. Toddlers are so temperamental and having another option to run to when they don't like what's being offered is the pits.
Trying To Get Your Baby To Sleep
I loved having my husband waiting in the other room to sub in when I was trying to get our newborn daughter to sleep, but having him right at my shoulder worrying and wondering along with me if she was ever going to sleep again, was too stressful. The hard work of putting a baby to sleep should be done in shifts when one needs a break from shushing and rocking and patting, not in tandem.