Although information is easier to come by than ever these days, many men and women still face a persistent lack of factual information about women's sexuality. Many ideas are still shrouded in rumor, misinformation, and straight-up falsehoods. In fact, there are plenty of myths about the clitoris that need to be cleared up. After all, everyone should know the true story behind the mighty love button.
Whether you call it the clit, bean, or bald man in a boat, this sensitive organ can have fantastic benefits for your sex life. Unfortunately, the barrage of clit misinformation floating around may get in your way. You or your partner may expect all clits to function the same way, instead of taking the time to fully understand and appreciate your own equipment. Everyone's sexual tastes and preferences are a little different, and taking the time and effort to find your own groove is always worthwhile. Although its functionality, responsiveness, and even size are often greatly misunderstood, the mighty little clitoris is still one of your body's more amazing sex organs. So take a few minutes to rethink the way you approach its role in your life: you just might be surprised by the many things your clit can accomplish.
Myth 1: Just Say The ABC's And She's Done
The old "spell out the ABCs with your tongue" trick is not the only way to stimulate a clitoris. According to Men's Health, it might be better for your partner to focus on spelling out a few letters at a time to have you find the motions that work best. After all, pleasure is a team effort.
Myth #2: It's Impossible To Find
Although there are plenty of jokes about the clit being impossible to find, it isn't that tricky once you know a little about anatomy. The majority of the clitoris resides within the pelvis, according to the Museum of Sex. The external part — the little "button" that exists near the top of your lips — is called the glans, as the Museum of Sex further explained. Leaning more about your internal anatomy is a great way to understand your body's sexual responses in a more thorough way.
Myth #3: It's Tiny
Hey, don't just judge by what your eyes can see. Although the external glans is only about five millimeters long, the entire clitoral body (plus glans) is closer to 16 millimeters in length, according to a piece in Obstetrics & Gynecology. There is nothing diminutive about the full clitoris.
Myth #4: It's Ugly
Clits come in all shapes and sizes, and it can be a maddening and self-defeating practice to compare your body to the images of women on TV or porn. But there has been a huge uptick in surgery around this area; according to the American Society for Aesthetic Plastic Surgery, there was a 49 percent increase in labiaplasty procedures from 2014 to 2015. Of course it's cool if you want surgery, but keep in mind that there is no one-size-fits-all standard for this part of your body.
Myth #5: They Serve No Purpose
The clit definitely has a reason for existence. According to Psychology Today, the only reason your clitoris exists is for pleasure, making it unique among all male and female organs. So you might as well celebrate its reason for being.
Myth #6: Vaginal Orgasms Trump Clitoral Orgasms
If you want to dive into a never-ending loop of argument and speculation, look into the differences between vaginal and clitoral orgasms. As explained in Live Science, the existence of the elusive vaginal orgasm is still debated; some researchers have round that the vaginal orgasm is simply a type of clitoral orgasm, whereas others classify them as separate entities altogether. This just goes to show that the vaginal orgasm (if it exists) is in no way superior to a clitoral orgasm.
Myth #7: More Force Is Better
Sure, some people really do prefer rough stimulation. But for some women, the lightest touch is all it takes. Follow Cosmopolitan's lead and get your parter to use the non-dominant hand to kick off manual stimulation, and offer advice along the way. You can, and should, have personal preferences about what kind of stimulation works for you, whether that involves a feather touch or something a little more intense.
Myth #8: Your Partner Should Know Exactly How To Stimulate It
Yes and no. Any partner, especially a new one, should be willing and able to learn about your clit preferences. But it's okay if this entails a bit of a learning curve. Figuring things out together is half the fun.
Myth #9: It's Like Pressing A Button
Some parters try to go at your clit like it's your body's personal Konami Code. As explained by Cosmopolitan, the clit is not some doorbell that will feel amazing any time it's pushed; you need to be in the mood first. You have to like what's going on for that sensation to become pleasurable.