9 Reasons You're Fighting With Your Partner That Have Nothing To Do With You

Being in a relationship can be such a beautiful thing. From the way they make your heart flutter to the way they say "I love you," your partner probably knows every way to light up your world. But despite their ability to make you feel all tingly inside, every couple has a time where they begin to argue. Whether it's for things that you did or didn't do, arguments will arise and you will be able to move past them. Unfortunately, there may be instances where there are reasons you're fighting with your partner that have nothing to do with you.

Back when I was in college and dating my high school sweetheart, there was a time in our relationship where we did nothing but argue. Hey blew everything out of proportion and blamed me for everything. It got to the point where I just thought I wasn't built for relationships, because it felt as if I wasn't able to do anything right to him. That's when I started to realize that the reason I was fighting with my partner had nothing to do with me. We were fighting because he had unresolved issues within himself that he wasn't ready to deal with. It may have took me awhile to gather that, but after I did, it made the understanding much easier.

If you're not sure whether or not the reasons you and your partner are arguing have to do with you, these nine reasons may help you sort it out.


They Use Their Cellphone Too Much

According to Huffington Post, one reason that you could be fighting with your partner is because the use of cellphones is too high when around each other. This may make your spouse feel as if you're not considerate of them. Try putting the phone down every once and awhile.


They're Insecure

When you're dealing with an insecure partner, every little thing will become a fight. From the amount of time that you're spending with your friends to where you're going out to, their insecurities will have them taking it out on you.


They Have Baggage To Get Rid Of

Much like their insecurities, you could be fighting with your partner because they have a lot of unresolved baggage from their past. Due to the fact that they have issues that have not been dealt with from previous situations, they can either take it out on you or become easily sensitive to things that you talk about.


They're Friends Are Inappropriate

Cosmopolitan noted that another reason you could be fighting because of the things friends do. For example, if your friend is very outspoken and can come across rude, your significant other can argue with you about why you insist on hanging out with them.


They Still Haven't Learned How To Take Responsibility

According to The Guardian, some people in relationships are suffering from blame addiction — they don't take responsibility for their actions. Most people do not grow out of looking for someone to blame with things go wrong, so this could be a reason you are arguing.


They Assume

Another reason that you could be arguing with your partner is because there are too many assumptions made, Huffington Post noted. Thinking that your partner will do something just because you are together can cause an argument if they go against you.


They Had A Bad Day

Cosmopolitan also noted that arguments could occur if someone has had a bad day. When you're stressed or frustrated from the day, the easiest thing to do is to come home and bring it with you. In turn, you end up taking it out on the people who are there. Try not to bring home the work issues.



Every couple argues about money at some point. In the case where one person makes more than the other, this is an argument that is not about you; it's something that your partner has to be OK with internally.


They Have A Superiority Complex

The Asian Parent noted that the need for your partner to always be right could be a main reason you are arguing, because they are always defensive and won't admit when they're wrong. If this is an issue, try going to counseling or finding some alternative ways to communicate with them.