9 Times It's OK Not To Be In The Mood For Sex

by Jill Di Donato

Sometimes you just want to rip your significant other's clothes off. Other times, not so much. Face it, you're ocassionaly not down to get down. There are plenty of times it's OK not to be in the mood for sex. When researching this topic on the Internet, I found a deluge of articles offering women advice on how to turn their partners away politely. Although I agree being told, "Sorry, boo, I've got a headache" isn't music to the ears, it's not a crisis either. An article on the Daily Mail offering readers tips on getting your mojo back suggested, "If you don't want intercourse, what about oral sex?" Um, maybe I'm a bit lazy, but oral is even more work, people. Honestly, I don't think there has to be a whole to-do about saying, "Thank you, but no thank you."

And my research confirms my theory. Tons of women don't think it's a big deal to turn down a lover. Everyone feels like taking a break from sex occasionally. This is totally normal. It does not, I repeat, not mean you're not a sexual being or you've lost your desire forever. All it means is you're not in the mood. Case closed. But just in case you need convincing, here are 11 times, as told to me by my squad, that it's just fine to not want it.


When Your Doctor Says You Can't

Never mess with an M.D.'s instructions.


When You Have To Work

You're not going to enjoy sex if you're stressed about meeting a deadline.


When You're Stuffed

A full belly and downward facing sex doesn't make for an enjoyable night.


When You're On Your Period

I personally don't like having sex when it's my time of the month. It's not because I'm embarrassed by my body and its functions, it's because period sex can be a hassle. It's messy and I'm moody. And it's OK not to want to wash bloody sheets.


When You're Pissed Off

Angry sex can be hot. But it can also be not. I've found that when I'm a sh*t mood, the last thing I want to do is think about anyone else. And while endorphins are released during sex, they are also released by consuming chocolate in copious amounts reported the Medical Wellness Association (OK, I added the copious part).


When You Want To Sleep

What good is sex if you just want to fall asleep after.


When Your Partner Cheated On You

In an article published in Essence, one woman confessed that she didn't feel like sleeping with her husband after he cheated on her. Um, yeah, betrayal is a major turn off.


When You're High (On Weed)

While some people love getting stoned before a shag, Vice reported that getting high can cause vaginal dryness. Ouch!



Sex is not an obligation ‚ it's something that meant to be enjoyed by two (or three, or four, or more) people. If you're not feeling it, then that's totally fine.

So remember ladies, there's no reason to feel bad about not wanting to do it. You've gotta do you, not someone else.