I'll admit it — some days I just don't feel like being nice. Whether I wake up in a foul mood or something happens that just wrecks my sunny disposition, I end up being a grump. These are the days I must dig very deep and summon the strength to not take my bad attitude out on my husband. If this sounds familiar, you probably know these days don't make you the most supportive person in the world either. But when your SO needs you, it's good to think of ways to be more supportive of your partner, so you don't unintentionally take out your wrath on them.
Learning to be a supportive partner is a skill that takes time and practice to master, but don't underestimate the difference you can make in one day. Having a short list of ideas to pull from will help you in a pinch — and on those days you just aren't feeling it — to remind your partner that you are the strong foundation on which they can stand.
Relationships present a lot of challenges, but feeling like your partner doesn't have your back can deflate your spirit quickly. The next time you see that your SO needs you to be there for them, remember these nine ways to be more supportive in one day, and watch as your relationship grows stronger.
1. Ask What They Need
Everyone needs support in different ways. To know what type your SO needs, Psychology Today recommends asking your partner how you can best support them. Not only does this take the guess work out, it gives your partner a chance to share a need that they may have been holding in for some time.
2. Listen More, Advise Less
According to Psych Central, couples experience more problems when one or both partner(s) overdue the support. This typically occurs when one person is just looking to vent their frustrations, but the other keeps offering advice and solutions. Sometimes it's best to keep your lip zipped and nod your head while listening.
3. Pay Attention
I always feel very supported when I realize my husband has been paying attention. It's the small things that matter most — when he comes home with my fave Starbucks after I've had a long day, or asks how one of my personal projects is going. These efforts show me that he is invested in me and has my back.
4. Use Your Words
Words are powerful and can make or break someone's day. As Babble pointed out, when discussing big plans or dreams with your partner, be aware of how much negativity you put out there. Even if you're not fully on board yet, try to be as positive as possible to make your partner feel like they have your support.
5. Send A Love Note
Whether it's a quick text or a lovely handwritten card, sprinkle some love on your spouse and let them know you're on their team. Remind them of all the ways they are awesome and why you love them. Not only will it give them a boost, it will make you smile as well.
6. Create A Secure Environment
As Mind Body Green pointed out, when your partner goes through a tough time, having a safe space will encourage healing. Create an atmosphere that is free of judgement and allow your partner to express their feelings without shame or doubt.
It's not always easy, but sacrificing something you want in order to for your partner to have what they want, is a solid method of showing your support. The good news is, this can be reciprocal. So when the tables are turned and you need support, your partner will be willing to sacrifice their wants for yours.
8. Lighten Their Load
When your partner is extra busy, pick up some of the slack by finishing a few more of the shared responsibilities than normal. If it's their night to cook, grab some take out and let them know dinner has been checked off the to-do list.
9. Give Them A Shout Out
When your SO has something praiseworthy to share, give them a shout on on social media or call a special happy hour and give an doting toast in their honor. Acknowledging their hard work will show how much you support what they do.