From the outside, Hollywood moms often seem to have things easy. But every time one gets honest about the struggles they have faced as a mother, it reminds fans that celebrity moms are just people, too. In a new, vulnerable interview, Busy Philipps discussed her husband's lack of support as a father after they had their first baby — and she also explained how they overcame it.
Philipps is the cover star of Parents magazine's November issue, and in her interview, she opened up about her husband, screen writer Marc Silverstein, according to People. After the couple welcomed their first child, Birdie, in 2008, Silverstein's parenting efforts greatly disappointed his wife. “He was not understanding how to be a dad and, in fact, didn’t try. I was parenting by myself,” Philipps told Parents, as per People. “When I told him I wanted to have a second child, he said, ‘Fine, but it’s all on you.’ That was so heartbreaking.”
During that rough time, Philipps learned that in a marriage, at least one person must be "willing to fight" — and that was her. "I went to Marc several times and said, ‘I cannot do this anymore. Something has to change, and it’s you,’" she continued.
Once Silverstein began to put in effort as well, things started to get better. Philipps also told Parents, according to People:
We’ve had a lot of serious discussions and counseling, and he’s incredibly participatory now in a way I don’t think he could’ve imagined before. We’re a work in progress but trying our best, and that’s the most you can do.
Parenting a young child alongside a partner who isn't actually parenting sounds incredibly stressful, and it's a relief that Silverstein was able to step up to the plate after working on it.
Philipps has discussed her efforts to fight the stereotype of moms being perfect on multiple occasions inthe past. In a September 2017 interview with Elle, she said:
I think that this idea that we all have to be perfect and good at everything, and able to have a career, and be at the soccer game, and make a lunch for our children that we can Instagram is totally unrealistic. I think people are getting more vocal about that.
And in an October 2017 interview with InStyle, Philipps further elaborated on that point:
The idea that we all have to be Pinterest-perfect, killing it on all fronts, drinking our probiotics, remembering to have Rishi, and putting all these things in our kids' lunches. There's a lot of pressure to do all of the things. And we can't do all of the things—I can do a few things, and I've got them nailed. I think that's more realistic.
Even though that tough period with Silverstein was undoubtedly painful for Philipps, it seems like she is now at the point where she can laugh about it. On Father's Day this year, she poked fun at herself for being "bossy AF," and she assured fans that her husband was now an incredible father. She captioned a photo on Instagram:
Marc wasn't sure he wanted kids when we met. Then he thought one was enough. Good thing I'm bossy AF because no one was more meant to be a father than this guy. Happy Fathers Day to Marc, who is the greatest, most loving and most fun dad to our little girls and HFD to all you dads out there doing your dad thing.
Busy Philipps' openness about the rough edges of marriage and motherhood helps remind those facing similar challenges that they are not alone, and that is so important.