The Bachelor has always played coy when it comes to sex, despite being a show entirely focused on dating with the intention of getting married. Usually things edge into Rock Hudson and Doris Day territory, with veiled references and jokey embarrassment (like making guys tell "funny" sex anecdotes on stage during a group date in JoJo's season). It doesn't feel very modern, particularly when it comes time for the show's infamous nudge-nudge, wink-wink visit to the fantasy suite late in the game. The fantasy suite doesn't absolutely mean the Bachelor or Bachelorette is going to be getting down with their suitors, but it is heavily implied. But has any couple not wanted to wait until overnight dates? Has anyone had sex before the fantasy suite on The Bachelor?
First things first: there's no shame in it if they did. The fantasy suites can be a lot of pressure, and there's nothing wrong with deciding to have sex before the official overnight dates. If everyone involved is comfortable and happy about making the choice to have sex, then they should feel free to go forth and have fun. Two couples have decided to take the next step before the fantasy suites, and based off of the promo for Nick's season, which aired right after the premiere, it looks like Corinne may try to get her and Nick to the the third. But for one past couple, it was a more complicated decision.
Nick Viall & Kaitlyn Bristowe
Nick and Kaitlyn didn't sleep together in the fantasy suite; instead it happened during a one-on-one date in Dublin. Kaitlyn had to deal with some unfair flack for her decision, and she's spoken about the double standard when it comes to male and female contestants who choose to have sex on the show. She told People that she didn't regret sleeping with Nick, but that the entire situation was a difficult one to navigate. "It's just such a confusing world to live in where it's this gray area of what's right and what's wrong, and when do you sleep with somebody and talk about it?" she said. "Or do you just wait ten more days and not talk about it after the Fantasy Suite?"
Courtney Robertson & Ben Flajnik
In her book I Didn't Come Here to Make Friends, Courtney revealed that during a beach date she and Ben had sex "for about twenty seconds" onscreen in the ocean. While she was cool with it, Ben was a little less thrilled about the fact that fifty thousand viewers got to see their intimate moment. They ended up getting engaged, but broke up later on.
But while they're the only confirmed couples, rumors have swirled about other contestants as well. According to series creator Mike Fleiss, Bachelors usually end up sleeping with an average of three women per season (presumably those they invite to the fantasy suites) though Bachelor Bob Guiney inexplicably slept with five to sixteen women during his run on the show; so numbers vary. It was implied that Juan Pablo Galavis may have also had his share of ocean sex while he was the Bachelor, but his swimming buddy Clare Crawley insisted that nothing happened beyond taking a dip.
The important thing to remember is that the decision to have sex is up to those involved: whether it happens in the fantasy suite or before, it's their choice and they shouldn't be shamed for it.