Dealing with disappointments at work can be really difficult, just as dealing with disappointments outside of work can sometimes pose a challenge. Feeling like you've been let down, however that might have occurred, can sort of make you feel unsettled, confused, or hurt. And though you want to believe that you and your boss are on the same team, when they disappoint you, it can sometimes seem like that's not exactly the case. But if your boss disappoints you in these ways, you need to leave your job, or at least consider what other kinds of options you might have to make sure that you're taking care of yourself and your career and not sacrificing too much in order to stay in the same place.
Oftentimes, under the best circumstances, you want to trust your boss and believe that they have your best interests at heart. But sometimes they do things that make you question that (or even seemingly prove to you that they definitely don't). If your boss disappoints you once or twice, you might not need to reevaluate your entire situation, but if they do certain things or continue to disappoint you again and again, it might be time to start looking for something new because it just may be time for you to move on to better things.
1. Your Boss Took Credit For Your Work
It can feel like a sort of betrayal when your boss takes credit for work or ideas that you know are yours. If it's happening repeatedly, it might be time for you to consider moving on. "You should always approach your boss to try and talk through what is happening, understand their side of the story," Miki Feldman Simon, the founder of IamBackatWork, tells Romper by email. "You may be surprised to learn of other contributing factors, from business constraints that are affecting their decisions to your behavior." But if conversations don't address your concerns, it may be time for you to reconsider if this working relationship is the best one for you and your goals.
2. You & Your Boss Disagree On Something That's Very Important To You
You're bound to disagree with your boss or coworkers from time to time because no one agrees on everything. But if you and your boss regularly disagree on something that is fundamental to your belief system or you disagree on everything all the time, that too could mean it's time to look for another job, Feldman Simon says. In a case like this, it might be worth considering the ramifications of leaving your job, but ultimately, it could be what's best.
3. They Handled A Problem In A Way With Which You Didn't Agree
Since no one agrees on everything all the time, your boss may, at one point or another, handle a problem or crisis in a way with which you don't agree. Feldman Simon says that this, too, might be a situation that requires you to leave your job. "If you find that you are disappointed with your bosses more than once, you should have a good look at yourself and assess whether your expectations from your bosses are realistic, and how you are contributing to the situation," Feldman Simon adds.
4. You Feel As Though They Don't Support You When You Need It
Having a supportive boss can be a game-changer and if you feel like you never (or rarely) have the support that you need when you need it, that can make you feel like you're not valued. "We spend most of our days in the office, being unhappy there, usually affects other aspects of our lives, not just our time at work," Feldman Simon says. "If you have reached the point that you are just unhappy, you should leave."
5. Your Boss Overlooks Or Underestimates You & Your Abilities
If your boss underestimates you or doesn't seem to trust that you're able to handle things, that can certainly cause disappointment, embarrassment, and frustration. In an interview with The Ladder, Roberta Matuson of Matuson Consulting, said that if your boss regularly asks to check your work, it might mean they don't have think you're able to get the job done. If your boss doesn't have any confidence in your abilities, you might be better off finding one who does.
6. Your Boss Makes Promises They Never Keep
Broke promises can get a bit exhausting, particularly when they happen over and over again.
"For example, your boss can promise a particular promotion, raise, bonus, etc. and not deliver," James Pollard, a career coach at TheAdvisorCoach.com, tells Romper in an email exchange. "If that happens consistently, your career track is stalled. And these instances ruin trust in a working relationship. Trust is vital for the workplace."
Being let down once because of something out of their control is one thing, but if your boss consistently promises things to you that never seem to materialize, you likely shouldn't spend much time waiting around, hoping for that to change.
7. Your Boss Disrespected You
Pollard says that if your boss treats you disrespectfully, you need to leave your job and find something else where you're treated more respectfully. You shouldn't have to tolerate disrespect or abuse and sticking around hoping it will change likely won't do you any good.
If you do decide to leave your job because a boss disappoints you, or for any other reason, you should still think about how you're going to frame your experiences (including those surrounding your leaving), to future prospective employers. "Interviewers do not want to hear you bad mouth previous employers," Feldman Simon says. "Since they likely will not know your boss, their assumption may be that whatever happened was your fault. When explaining why you left, try to stick to facts, leaving out emotions, and quickly talk about what you are looking for, the positive — rather than the negative — what you did not like in the previous role." There are some things that you shouldn't have to tolerate or wait out, but making sure that you're leaving in a way that isn't going to hurt you down the road is still a good idea.