Life
Getting back into a sexual groove post-pregnancy, whether you delivered vaginally or via C-section, can be a challenge. Your body has changed tremendously through pregnancy and delivery. Things that used to feel good, may not feel so great any more. Certain positions that used to rock your world might be off limits for awhile. One popular position that comes to mind is girl on top, also known as cowgirl. As you explore your new sexual life post baby you might wonder, is it safe to do girl on top six weeks after C-section? Mostly yes, but you'll want to take some things into account before you try to ride.
For those feeling underwhelmed or simply bored by missionary, the girl on top position can be quite liberating and fun. It's certainly not the most adventurous position on the block, but girl on top allows women to be more in control of their pleasure as explained in Women's Health magazine.
Even if girl on top was part of your pre-baby sexual repertoire, you'll still want to make sure you approach it safely after having a C-section. It might feel different in both good and bad ways, and taking a few precautions will help you figure it out. Here are seven things you might want to consider before taking a sexual ride post C-section.
1
Make Sure Your Incision Is Healed
"As long as mom's scar is fully healed with no infection, adhesions or other complications, there's no reason why she can't be on top during sex after a C-section," Lamaze certified childbirth educator Deena Blumenfeld of Shining Light Prenatal Education, tells Romper. She stresses however, that a mom who's had a C-section may be dealing with weak abdominal muscles still at the six week mark (and sometimes beyond), so it's best go slow and don't push it.
2
Accomodate For Vaginal Dryness
"If you are breastfeeding you are still in 'postpartum menopause,' meaning you have no libido and your vagina is dry," Dr. Sherry A. Ross, women's health expert and author of She-ology: The Definitive Guide to Women’s Intimate Health. Period, tells Romper in an interview.
You can blame your dry lady bits on bonkers hormones. After you give birth, your estrogen levels take a nose dive and your prolactin (the hormone that produces milk) goes through the roof. Those two forces working in tandem is what causes many women to be less hot under the hood and bone dry. Many things can help this, like lots of lube. Ross says that "patience, time, and KY," will make the experieince more pleasurable again.
3
Be Prepared To Control The Depth Of Penetration
How deep is your love? You're about to find out if you try girl on top while you're still healing postpartum.
"Sexual positions where there is deeper penetration such as the woman on top or doggy style can be more uncomfortable even if you haven't recently had a baby," Ross explains. "Most women feel as though they need more than six weeks to resume sexual intercouse after having a baby, especially after a C-section." So if girl on top is your jam, you may want tread lightly at first. You can also make modifications if needed or try some other positions that might feel good until deeper penetration is back on the menu.
4
Set The Ryhthm And Pace
Even though girl on top may be uncomfortable for some women because of the deeper penetration, it might actually work better for others. Many tout it as a great position to try in the postpartum phase because it leaves you in charge.
"This is an excellent position post C-section because it places no direct pressure on the scar and you’re in control over the pace and rhythm, which may help you relax and feel more empowered as you return to sexy time with your partner," Dana B. Myers, founder of Booty Parlor and author of The Mojo Makeover: 4 Weeks to a Sexier You, tells Romper.
5
Ask For A Lot Of Foreplay
As mentioned above, you may be a little dry down there while you recover from your C-section. Lube helps, but you can also try to build up some natural lubrication of your own. It might not work, but it's certainly worth a shot.
"As with any sex — but especially the sex you’re having right after birth - get started with a lot of foreplay to warm up and build arousal," Myers says. "That might mean you request a full-body massage from your partner, lots of kissing, slow sensual touching, etc."
6
Listen To Your Body
I know the saying "listen to your body" can get old, but it's so relevant here and can't be stressed enough. Especially for the safety of postpartum, C-section mothers.
"Beyond clearance from your doctor, the most important factor in returning to sex after birth is to 'listen to your body,'" Myers says."What does your body say? What would be the most comfortable positions? What kind of pleasure would inspire healing and delight?" Answer those questions and explore them with your partner.
Blumenfeld echoes those sentiments and adds a simple guideline to follow if you're unsure. "If it feels OK to be in that position, then it is," she says. "If it is painful or uncomfortable it's time to take a break and wait a little while longer."
7
Speak Up To Your Partner If Needed
Keeping the lines of communication very open and honest will be the key to successful post C-section sex.
Myers suggests that you, "vocalize your pleasure (or displeasure) with simple phrases like more 'slowly,' 'please,' or 'this feels uncomfortable, let’s try reverse cowgirl instead.'" She believes that communicating your pleasures and preferences honors your body and your relationship. Giving your partner access to your thoughts and feelings gives them the opportunity to pleasure you the way you want to be pleasured. It also enables them to nurture you and be gentle with your healing body.
If riding on top is your thing and you're ready, you should give it a try. If cowgirl doesn't work for you anymore you can pause and take a break or try something new. Just because your postpartum body has changed a bit, doesn't mean sex will be bad. It just might be different than before.
