Let's be honest — being in a relationship isn't always a run through field of flowers and butterflies. There are times when it feels like you're running against the wind on a cliff, in the middle of a tornado. And during those rough patches, which can last for a longer period of time, you may find yourself asking "is my relationship worth fighting for."
Truthfully speaking, I've asked this a few times when the roads have gotten rough in my relationship. It's not as easy as people think it is to be with someone, and although love shouldn't be complicated, it can definitely produce a few bumps along the way. Honestly, I don't know anyone who hasn't had a rough patch in their relationship or anyone who — at some point — may have questioned whether or not their relationship was worth continuing. Even if it was only for a split second when your significant other did something that you didn't like, having that moment is normal and more people need to know that it's OK to have this feeling every now and again.
If you've ever questioned whether your relationship is the one that you should be in, here are 13 timely questions you should ask yourself to be sure.
1. Why Do I Love Them?
One way to find out if your relationship is worth fighting for would be to ask yourself why you love your partner. Every relationship goes through difficult times, but love really can conquer all. So, if you think that your love is worth the fight, remind yourself why it began.
2. Is The Love Unconditional?
Much like the above, questioning whether or not the love you have for one another is unconditional is a way to determine if this is really it. Unconditional love is the best type of love, so if you know that you two can love one another no matter what, you should fight for the relationship.
3. Do We Show Each Other Respect?
Having respect for one another is one of the most important aspects of a relationship. If your partner does not respect you or you have lost respect for them, your relationship may not be worth fighting for.
4. Do You Enjoy Spending Time Together?
According to Psychology Today, you need to be honest about how you feel spending time with your partner. If you've grown to the point where spending time with your lover is not enjoyable anymore, your relationship may need to be dissolved.
5. Are Our Beliefs Aligned?
Do you and your significant other believe in the same things? Are you core values aligned? Bustle noted that if your core values and beliefs are aligned, it may be worth fighting through whatever issues you have. You'll never agree on everything, but as long as the things that are important to you such as religion, finances, and family align, this may be one relationship to keep.
6. Can I Be Myself Without Trouble?
When you're in a relationship that makes you feel like you can't be yourself, you should leave. If the response to this question is on the negative side, your relationship may not be the one.
7. How Is The Support?
Does your partner support you? Do you wholeheartedly support them? Asking yourself these questions is a good way to know if you should be pushing for your relationship to continue on. Nothing is worse than having a partner that doesn't believe in or support you, so make sure you're dealing with someone who does.
8. How's The Communication?
According to Lifehack, determining if your relationship has the right communication is important. The longer you are in a relationship, the easier it is to cut down on communication. If it's gotten to the point where communication is rare and you don't think it can be placed back in, it may be time to call it quits.
9. Am I Willing To Put In The Work?
One of the most important things to ask yourself about your relationship is whether or not you're willing to put the work in to fix it, as The Huffington Post noted. If you're both willing to make an effort to save your relationship, things could definitely work out.
10. Can I Picture Life Without This Person?
Being able to picture your life without your spouse is a key sign that the relationship is on its way to being over. When you're with someone and you're in love, every future plan you make is inclusive of them. If it's gotten to the point where the "we" has gone back to "me," this may not be one that you want to fight for.
11. Are The Problems Specific To the Relationship?
According to The Huffington Post, you should ask yourself if the problems are specific to your relationship. It's very easy to think that there are things out there better than what you have currently, but if the problem isn't specific to something in your relationship, you'll always have those feelings — no matter who you're with. The best way to resolve the feeling could be to just stick it out and move through it together.
12. Is The Attraction Still There?
If the attraction is still present between you and your spouse, you should consider fighting for the relationship, Lifehack noted. There will be times where you find others attractive, but if you don't feel the need to act on it, fighting for your relationship could be the best option.
13. Is This Forced?
One of the most important things I've asked myself in the past when I wasn't sure about my relationship was if I was forcing it to be what it was. Sometimes, people force a relationship to stay together because they don't want to be alone or because they are afraid of their spouse finding someone better. Regardless of the reason, if the relationship is forced, it'll never work out.