Royal family fans had a collective flip-out on Monday morning, when news broke that Prince Harry and Meghan Markle have announced their engagement. But it seems to be one of the official rules of the internet that nothing nice and pure can stay nice and pure for long, so of course people had to immediately start speculating that Meghan Markle had a "baby bump." The source of the rumors? The accomplished actress, humanitarian, and royal-to-be wore a slightly larger coat for her photo op with the press...
It's November, people! Of course she's wearing a coat! (A super-gorgeous one, I might add.) And coats, by design, are not skin-tight. In the grand scheme of clothing designed to highlight the flatness or roundness of one's stomach, coats are generally tied with mumus for dead-last.
But setting aside the shape of coats for a moment, can the world please stop with the constant scrutiny of women's bodies, seizing upon the slightest changes or perceived changes in stomach shape as an excuse to scream "PREGNANT" from the proverbial rooftops? Markle and Prince Harry just announced their super-exciting engagement. They seem to make a delightful couple. They're both actively involved in making the world a better place. Let's celebrate this news on its own without having to add on some baby to make it complete.
People on Twitter aren't the only ones immediately twisting a happy announcement into speculation about when Markle will pop out a potential heir. According to Metro, bookies are already taking bets on what's going on inside her uterus, because apparently an incredibly private and personal decision about a woman's body is now akin to guessing which team will win a football game. Hey, if the thrill of studying various contenders in a horse race is wearing thin, why not study Markle's body for changes like she's also a prize animal?
Uh, maybe because it's creepy and invasive, and women are not horses/breeding machines.
Sure, you could get out a magnifying glass and stare at Markle's stomach in that white coat for hours, then compare it to photos of her stomach from a month ago, then put up all the photos on your wall, and connect them with red string until you've solved this grand pregnancy mystery. Or you could recognize that having a baby is not necessarily the most important thing that Markle could possibly do right now (or ever?), and take a moment to, say, read her thoughtful, affecting piece in TIME about how the stigma of menstruation affects the potential of girls worldwide.
Or you could revel in the total fairy tale romance of Prince Harry telling a reporter at Kensington Palace, according to NBC News, on Monday, "When did I know she was the one? The very first time we met." Or you could swoon at the fact that Markle apparently didn't even let him finish the proposal before saying "yes," and get a hearty dose of that "Stars! They're just like us!" feeling at the reveal that Prince Harry proposed while they were cooking chicken for dinner.
When contemplating all the photos of the couple announcing their engagement, maybe stop looking at her stomach, and start looking at their joy-filled faces instead. It'll be a much more rewarding experience.
Luckily, amid a flurry of pregnancy speculation, at least one hero on Twitter chimed in with the perfect antidote to all the focus on Markle's body:
Sure, these are probably just the first drops in a Markle pregnancy speculation monsoon. There's nothing that people seem to like more than a royal baby, after all. But for now, let's leave all the baby excitement to Kate Middleton and Prince William, who are expecting in the spring, and just get really freaking excited for Markle, the soon-to-be Duchess of Sussex.
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