Real Resolutions: Ruby D. On Why She's Spending This Year Focused On Intention
January is a month filled with resolutions. On the first day of the month, as each of us wave goodbye to the previous year, we make way for all the things we plan to do once we have a fresh slate. We ask ourselves, What will I do better this year? How will I do better? What do I want to change about myself? About my behaviors? How can I improve? Resolutions made by women by and large get a bad rap. At face value, it's so easy to assume they'll all be the same: I'm going to lose weight!; I'm going to wake up earlier!; I'll travel! but if you take a look deeper, you'll notice just how raw and real resolutions made by women — especially moms — are. They're complex, multi-layered, and they're also incredibly honest.
Mothers aren't just making resolutions for themselves. They're constantly factoring in how the things they do and say and believe will shape and influence their children. Though moms are faced with these types of decisions day in and day out, the new year provides an opportunity to look at the year as a whole and to consider all the things they plan to change and improve on. For 2017, Romper spoke to 31 different moms all over the country in an effort to highlight just how diverse, bold, and exciting their resolutions are.
Name: Ruby Dixon
City and state: Raleigh, North Carolina
Occupation: N/A, I was laid off several months ago from a tax and wealth management firm and I'm looking for employment in a physical therapy office.
How old are your kids? 2 years old and 7 years old
What resolution do you think you're supposed to make? Why do you feel this way?: Well, most people seem to go for living healthier and happier. I do try to do this for the benefit of myself and my family, but I don't wait around for a new year to start. To me, there is little magic or significance to a new year. A changed digit in the date will not erase any previous problems, so I see no reason to wait to better our lives.
I'm not a hasty decision maker. I carefully weigh my options before acting so I can move forward with peace of mind, knowing that I chose what was best given the current situation.
What's your actual resolution this year, and why?: To continue to make progress toward my goals for my family and my career. Specifically, I intend to submit my applications to programs for a Doctorate of Physical Therapy and provide my children with guidance to navigate our hectic world.
What's the one resolution you won't make again?: I like to keep an open mind, plus I haven't been big on making resolutions in the past so I would say none!
What's one thing in your life you want to change but don't feel like you can?: Does the state of our economy count? I would love to see more job opportunities for young adults like myself who are trying to establish themselves but are having an extremely difficult time getting started.
What's one thing you did or didn't do last year that you forgive yourself for?: I try to live my life without regrets so I rarely have cause to forgive myself. I have made difficult decisions, like choosing to make time for pursuing a career as a physical therapist despite a busier schedule, discontinuing my son's treasured martial arts lessons even though they helped him control his energy levels at school so we could provide food for a few more months, and allowing him to paint his nails depsite the inevitable bullying. I'm not a hasty decision maker. I carefully weigh my options before acting so I can move forward with peace of mind, knowing that I chose what was best given the current situation.
Do you tell your kids your resolution? Why or why not?: No. We don't make a big deal out of resolutions in our home. I do, however, often share my ideas, goals, and plans with my children and ask if they have goals and plans on how to achieve them.
What specifically do you want for your kids this year?: I want my children to have ample opportunity to develop friendships and skills that will benefit them for many years to come. I will also be grateful if they can be humbled but not burdened by the financial struggles my husband and I currently face from day to day.