When entering into relationships, you take on different roles. Maybe you're the responsible one who makes sure your friends get home safe after a wild night. But perhaps in your love life, you're the planner, ensuring that all social events and household chores are checked off the list. Some of these behaviors come naturally, based on personality, while other times you may driven by how you can help others — especially your partner — live their best life. And it may be as simple as one question you ask your partner every night before bed that helps you both to grow as individuals.
For as long as I can remember, I have taken on the role of encourager in most friendships and romantic relationships. Few things give me more pleasure than seeing the people I love reach their goals and live a life they are stoked about. My husband and I always try to do our best in cheering on one another in our pursuits, and one of the best things we have learned is making sure we are checking in with each other to stay accountable for these goals. Not only does it keep me on track, it reminds me that we are in it together. To encourage your partner, before you go to bed each night, simply ask: "What do you hope to accomplish tomorrow?"
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As Psychology Today pointed out, creating specific plans makes goals more attainable. This means aiming for something to accomplish the next day is more productive than a general goal. For example, if your partner's goal is to finally write that novel they've been penning in their head for three years, when you ask them what they hope to accomplish tomorrow, they can pin point how many words or pages they need to produce, instead of just saying something generic like, "work on my book." This question gives them an opportunity to focus in on the small steps needed to get to the end result.
Making this a nightly ritual has some added benefits. After getting specific about tomorrow's goal, you can prompt your partner to visualize what taking those steps to reach that goal will look like. Visualizing yourself reaching your goals is extremely powerful, according to Entrepreneur. This strategy has been used by top athletes, performers, and business professionals for years to help them program their mind for success.
Encouraging your SO to reach their goals is a beautiful thing, and the icing on top is that you get some pretty sweet kick-backs as well. As world famous motivational speaker, Zip Ziglar said, "you will get all you want in life if you help enough other people get what they want." So even though you may be the one pushing goal progress along, doesn't mean you will be left behind. As a matter of fact, as you ask your partner this questions each night, take time to ask yourself what you hope to accomplish tomorrow as well.
In relationships, it's important to know the other person has your back. Being an encouraging presence for your partner will not only help them to become a better person, but it will also create a bond between the two of you. Your partner will know that they can rely on you to be there for them in a way that no one else can, and because of you they were able to accomplish something that enriches their life. And all because you took the time to ask them one little question before lights out.