On Monday, the legal drama between exes Blac Chyna and Rob Kardashian reached a fever pitch when Chyna successfully secured a restraining order against Kardashian, according to TMZ. The restraining order, which followed Kardashian's alleged violation of California's revenge porn laws when he posted nude photos reportedly of Chyna to the internet, has prompted fans to discuss the future of the couple's relationship. Unfortunately, fans have been repeating the one thing you shouldn't say about Dream Kardashian amid all the chatter and speculation: that hopefully he and Chyna will just "work things out" for Dream's sake. (Kardashian's attorney, Robert Shapiro, for a comment on the restraining order against his client as well as the revenge porn allegations.)
In a perfect world, kids wouldn't be stuck in the middle of their parents' fighting. Unfortunately for 8-month-old Dream, she's at the center of Kardashian and Chyna's nasty and public feud. To make matters even worse, the topic of what's best for Dream is currently being discussed on the internet by total strangers. Some fans even think Kardashian and Chyna should get back together for Dream's sake. Although there's a lot of terrible things fans could be saying, that opinion about Dream is particularly upsetting when you consider that children can suffer emotional trauma due to their parents' fighting. University of Notre Dame psychologist E. Mark Cummings told WebMD:
... children's emotional security is affected by the relationship between the parents — not just the child's relationship to the parent.
And, unfortunately, those who think Dream is too young to be affected by Kardashian and Chyna's fights are wrong. Researcher Alice Graham said to The Telegraph:
Far from being oblivious to parents’ conflicts, infants’ processing of stimuli, such as an angry tone of voice, may occur even during sleep.
Considering the cons of a Chyna and Kardashian reconciliation outweigh the benefits, people might be confused as to why some fans want them to reconcile. Unfortunately, there's still a lot of stigma and judgment on the topic of divorce and separation after a couple has children, despite the fact that it has become more and more common.
Although divorce or separation can be painful and difficult, many researchers and legal analysts believe it's better for two unhappy parents to divorce. Ultimately, the idea that it's best to stay together for the sake of the kids is a faulty one.
In an essay for the HuffPost, former divorce attorney Brette Sember explained:
If you stay married for the sake of your children, you expose them to daily arguments, negative undercurrents, shouting, possible violence, and an atmosphere that is in no way calm and peaceful. This has a huge impact on your child. When parents stay in a bad marriage, kids have to cope with the fall out from a never ending cycle of disputes, resentment, sadness, and even hate. A bad marriage is an open wound that can never heal as the scab is picked off again and again no matter how hard the parents try to keep things together for the sake of the kids. Children live in a volatile environment, which even if it is not violent, it is not nurturing and loving.
Although Sember admitted that things can be hectic following a separation, she argued that the home environment will eventually regulate for the better, according to the HuffPost:
Things are complicated in the months following divorce, but most families get through this transition and find a new normal. Children are no longer riding the waves of their parents’ relationship on a daily basis. Things settle down and everyone is calmer and less combative.
Although a breakup is not necessarily a happy occasion, it's clear Kardashian and Chyna need to amicably separate for good. There's no question Dream deserves to grow up in a healthy and stress-free environment away from the fighting.