The wise people of Twitter have finally addressed that ethical conundrum we all face as our finger would hover over the star icon, wondering if we could really deem something a favorite when our feelings about it were actually just a shade above lukewarm. Swapping our stars for hearts, Twitter changed favorites to likes. Big day, if only they'd left the favorite button just a little bit longer so I could use it to express my feelings for this very change! This will make the internet a slightly-more-honest place, especially for those of us who don't have dozens, or hundreds, or thousands of favorites, which is pretty much everyone. Unless, of course, you're truly one of those people who gets excited for everything. I'm looking at you, camp counselors, cheerleaders, and kindergarten teachers. Your unabashed enthusiasm inspires and confuses us all.
Anyway, I'm pretty jazzed that I'll have the ability to express when something is a 6.5 on my own personal one-to-ten scale of awesome. It's an amazing time to be alive knowing that we can share our feelings for things that fall somewhere between "sounds pretty good" and "love it so much I can't eat or sleep or breathe." Allow me to show you a few examples:
Non-Infinity Scarves
I will never say no to the opportunity to wear a scarf. Scarves are wonderful blankets for your face, and I am thankful for every cloudy day that allows me to sport one. However, I always gravitate toward my infinity scarves. Their lack of corners and tendency to stay in place far surpass their angular cousins.
Potatoes
I can't hate on the food that gives us french fries, however the fact remains that potatoes are not pasta, and they're only OK.
Scented Candles
Scented candles are nice. They're often colorful, they provide us with lovely aromatic ambiance in our homes, and they make adequate hostess gifts. But (and you knew there would be a "but"), their scents are often replicas of things I would rather just have, like freshly baked sugar cookies or pine needles.
Coffee From 90 Minutes Ago
Coffee from 0 minutes ago is always preferred, but I will not turn down lukewarm caffeine. It's sure as hell not my "favorite" though.
Justin Bieber
I'm actually rooting pretty strongly for the Biebs right now, and am about three nanoseconds away from calling myself a Belieber. The video for "Sorry" is mesmerizing, and roughly one-third of the gazillion YouTube views are from me trying to master the routine. But the fact remains that he's had some ups and downs and made a few questionable choices, so I'm not quite ready for call him a favorite... yet. To be continued.
When My Kiddo Wants Me To Read The Same Book Over and Over Again
I love having my little one snuggly on my lap and seeing him turn pages and point to things in the pictures. However, I don't love reciting the same story back to back... to back to back.
Birds*
*not counting Hedwig, obviously.
Drake's Turtleneck
It's a nice turtleneck, don't get me wrong. But I think I still would have preferred him in, say, a nice fitted v-neck in black, or perhaps navy, or even charcoal gray. I like it! But it's not a favorite.
Lyric Videos
Since it's no longer 1994, we're no longer counting on the inside liners of CDs for lyrics. My preferred places for them are angsty Tumblrs and questionable tattoos, not videos.
John Stamos
I like you, John Stamos. But you're not Uncle Jesse anymore, so I can't say that I favorite you.
Crackers
Other than nausea, are there any circumstances where crackers aren't inferior to bread?
Things Hosted By Ryan Seacrest
Yes, Ryan Seacrest is good at his 27 jobs. But when I watch his work, I can't help but feel like I should be doing something else. Watching Ryan Seacrest is a good-enough thing to do, but it's no one's favorite thing to do.
Coins
Technically, coins are currency so they're not a bad thing to have. However, for everyone one time I use them, there are five or ten times that I open my wallet and have them spill out everywhere.
Images: Getty Images; Giphy(13)
