Deciding to place a child up for adoption is undoubtedly an excruciating decision for any parent, however, it is still sometimes the correct and best one to make. There's no reason to compound a parent's stress by judging them for this choice, which is why Tyler Baltierra's response to someone shaming him for placing his daughter up for adoption is actually such an important message.
Let's start from the beginning. Baltierra and his partner, Catelynn Lowell, were high school sweethearts who got pregnant together back in 2009, according to E! News. The world first met them when they appeared on the first season of the MTV reality show, 16 and Pregnant. At the time, the couple determined that giving their daughter up for adoption was the best possible choice for all of them, given that they would not have been able to effectively care for their firstborn, Carly.
Since then, the couple has had three children together, welcoming their latest earlier this year, according to People. Though not all adoptions work like this, Baltierra and Lowell have remained in contact with their oldest daughter and her adoptive parents, and reconnect with her a few times a year.
However, in response to a now-deleted tweet in which someone callled the couple "trash" for "giving up" their daughter, as Us Weekly reported, Baltierra had some strong words.
"If PLACING my innocent daughter into an adoption plan at 16 with a couple who can not have biological children makes me trash, then you might as well send me to the damn dump so I can put a throne on top & call it home!" Baltierra responded on Twitter, seemingly emphasizing the word "placing" as opposed to "giving up," as it was a choice the couple made for their daughter's wellbeing, as well as their own.
And it seems that fans and followers agreed.
"My husband and I have 2 adopted boys. I couldn’t have children of my own. I went through years of infertility treatments. Thank God for adoption. We have the family we always dreamed of. Tyler you and Catelyn are awesome! Shame on this troll," one person responded.
Another shared, "My husband and I placed our first daughter to a couple who couldn’t have children and were desperately waiting for a baby. Now my husband and I have 2 more daughters together!! We see our first daughter often & it was deff the best choice."
After posting a photo of Carly holding her little sister, Nova, earlier this year, Baltierra shared with his Instagram followers how difficult it was to place her up for adoption. "10 years ago, we had to make the hardest decision of our lives & give you everything your innocent life deserved that we just couldn’t provide at the time," he captioned the photo. "10 years ago, we held each other & wept as we watched you drive away in the back of the car with the only parents that were worthy to be yours. 10 years ago... your life changed so many others for the better & has blessed more lives than I can count. We love you so much & hopefully get to see you soon baby girl."
Ultimately, adoption exists because some parents do not have the resources or ability to successfully raise a child, and some other couples who cannot have biological children would like to still have a family of their own. To shame someone for the undeniably excruciating choice to give up your child for the sake of their greater good is a lapse in logic and reason. It was incredible that Baltierra and Lowell had the maturity and foresight at such a young age to do what they felt was best for their daughter, and it is beyond evident that they love her very much and keep her as active in their lives as possible.
In the end, building a family of your own is neither a straightforward or simple process, and it makes no sense whatsoever to judge someone, even if they had to take a path different than you.