Craig Sjodin/ABC

Why 'Bachelor In Paradise' *Needs* Jordan

The Bachelorette isn't even close to being over for the season and fans (including myself) already wonder who will be on the next season of Bachelor in Paradise. Since he's this season's "villain," will Jordan be on Bachelor in Paradise? The Bachelorette contestant loves to be the center of attention — and I doubt he will be Becca's choice for a fiancé — so I think it is a strong possibility.

Update: Yes, Jordan Kimball will be on Bachelor In Paradise, as confirmed by People on June 26.

According to Jordan's ABC biography (and himself, whenever he is on camera), he is a male model based in Crystal River, Florida. "A former Business/Accounting major, Jordan turned his good looks into a professional modeling career," the bio says. (Oh boy, do the men write these themselves?) "When he's not posing for magazine shoots giving his best 'pensive gentleman' look, Jordan enjoys kayaking and running. With a personal best mile time of 4.24, Jordan's excited to sprint to the finish line with the Bachelorette."

Woof. Well, Jordan's certainly sprinting to win the award for most obnoxious contestant this season. So far his biggest blow-up has been an argument with fellow contestant David over — wait for it — Tinder matches. Yes, after a group date Jordan bragged that not only did he have over 4,000 Tinder matches and a 100 percent match success rate, but Tinder actually gave him a notification about it.

As someone who uses Tinder, every part of that sounds absurd to me. But even if Jordan were telling the truth, why would he talk about Tinder on The Bachelorette? David was, unsurprisingly, annoyed, and went to Becca about it. Becca was ticked, but not more ticked than Jordan was at David for ratting out on him. Thus began a feud that will undoubtedly end in a 2-on-1 date.

Why is Jordan still on the show? Becca wasn't happy about his Tinder bragging, and she doesn't even seem to like him that much. My guess is producer intervention to keep the drama up, which hopefully will culminate in a date that gets Jordan eliminated. USA Today reported a "wild theory" that Jordan is actually a secret agent out to protect Becca's heart — which isn't the most out-there theory that's ever been talked about in Bachelor Nation, but it's certainly one of the most offbeat.

The reasoning? Jordan is there to expose unpleasant characteristics in his fellow contestants. The first: David. I doubt David wins at this point — could that be because Jordan exposed his willingness to tattle? Furthermore, Jordan is now getting into it with Colton, who had a "romantic connection" to Becca's friend Tia. Does Jordan expose Colton, too?

This theory is all well and good, but I think the real reason Jordan is on the show is to be on television and further his "brand." This makes him a perfect contender for Bachelor in Paradise. Unfortunately, there's no official word on whether he'll be in Mexico this season, but I have my fingers crossed.

Jordan reminds me of Chad Johnson, a cartoony villain from JoJo Fletcher's season of The Bachelorette. After The Bachelorette, Chad jetted off to Paradise, where he went out in a blaze of glory and literally pooped his pants during a drunken tirade. It doesn't get much better than that. I don't know if Jordan could top this performance, but I hope for Bachelor Nation's sake he ends up on Paradise just for the entertainment factor. Given his need to further his modeling career, I think he'd be all for it. Oh, and he wouldn't have to wear a shirt most of the time — so if producers tell him that, he may sign up right then.