Why You Shouldn't Have Sex With Baby In The Room

No one is eager to get back to baby-making in the first few days after actually making a baby. As you let your body heal and adapt to the incessant needs of a newborn, sex is probably the furthest thing from your mind. Eventually, however, your libido will return. This leads to another quandary many parents face (even if they don't talk about it). Basically: will your baby remember you having sex in front of them? I mean, sex is beautiful and natural and everything, but you probably don't want it to be your child's very first memory.

The question can, understandably, leave a lot of parents feeling squeamish. On the one hand, your very young baby likely has no concept of what's going on. On the other hand, having sex with a kid in the room, no matter how young, can feel off-putting. But then again, you want to keep your relationship strong, even if you're co-sleeping and short on time and space. This dilemma can leave you and your partner in a pickle.

Because this question is so personal and potentially fraught with mixed feelings, it's helpful to start out with the objective facts. First, newborns are not making lasting memories. According to Baby Center, infants don't start making long-lasting memories of events until they are between 14 to 18 months old. That first year of life is crucial, of course, but your kid won't remember the specifics of it later in life.

The exact age at which kids start forming lifelong memories is tricky to pin down, however. According to WebMD, the majority of adults do not remember anything prior to age 3 or 4. There may be a few outliers here and there, of course, but for the most part the toddler years are a wash when it comes to lifelong recollections.

Basically, babies under the age of 3 or so will not remember you having sex in front of them for the rest of their lives. In fact, even parenting experts agree that having sex in front of a baby 6 months of age or younger is unlikely to have any lasting effects, as noted on Today. The kid simply won't understand.

That said, even if your kid is a newborn, you still may feel uncomfortable having sex with them in the room. And that's OK too — you aren't a prude or anything. Your child is still a conscious presence, after all, and that's enough to give plenty of couples pause. Sure, your sex life changes in many ways after having a kid, but that doesn't mean you have to abandon all of your privacy. Also, remember that this phase of life is temporary. One day your child will sleep through the night, all night, in a separate room. And you and your partner can get down however you like behind the privacy of a closed (and locked) bedroom door.