If you’ve ever been cold to your partner for a few hours waking up because you dreamed they cheated on you, or woke up with real tears covering your face, or thinking nostalgically about someone from your past, you already know that dreams can have a major impact on you in waking life. You might feel slightly bad if you’re in a relationship and you dream about marrying someone else, but dreams about getting married can give you insight into yourself (and do not mean you wish you were wed to someone else).
“The amazing news is not only are we problem-solving in our dreams, but the solutions to how you want to respond to the people and situations in your life, appear in your unconscious before reaching your conscious,” dream analyst Layne Dalfen tells Romper. So if you’re able to tap into your dreams and decode what they mean, they just may offer a solution to something that’s been bothering you. She adds that dreams are rarely literal, rather “they speak the language of metaphor.” This metaphor may come as a play on words or a pun (our dreams are jokesters) or a strange situation that’s a symbol for something more literal; for example, dreaming that your mother gets your wedding dress dirty while trying to zip it up could symbolize her making things harder for you even if she’s trying to help.
Read on to learn when it means if you dream about getting married (whether you are getting married, are already married, are single, or have no plans to marry).
What does it mean if you dream of marrying someone you’re not interested in?
For starters, if you actually are planning a wedding, it’s probably on your mind every day, and you can definitely expect to dream about it. When I was planning my wedding, the dream I had most frequently was that either I forgot or something was wrong with my dress. “If you are getting married soon and in the process of planning the event, it seems understandable and reasonable that there’s ‘stuff’ you are dealing with around the event, and no surprise to me that your dreams in this case will be problem solving whatever aspect of the plan (or the people and personalities you have to deal with), you’re finding difficult,” Dalfen says.
It can be unsettling to wake up and realize you dreamed about marrying someone else (maybe even a boss or a family member which feels... off). Instead of burying the dream, think about the qualities of the person you were marrying in the dream. Do they have a good sense of humor? Are they super organized? Delfen says the traits of this person can determine how you would like to handle your own wedding planning. “Don’t be surprised if you dream you are standing at the altar with one of the funniest, light-hearted, happy people you’ve ever met! Why? During your stressed out time these days, that will be your healthy unconscious mind, asking you to reach toward the aspect of yourself that knows how to be funny, light-hearted and happy,” Dalfen says, adding to tap into the part of yourself (light-hearted, organized etc.) that your dream spouse is showing you. Even if you’re single or not actively planning a wedding, the person you marry in your dream is often showing what side of yourself you want to tap into. “A dream, well decoded, will reveal a perfect mirrored reflection of the dreamer’s daylight current problem,” Dalfen says.
What does it mean if you dream about marrying someone whose face you can’t see?
It’s actually not uncommon to dream about marrying someone whose face you never see, or you know in the dream that you’re preparing for the wedding, but you never actually get to the part at the altar. Dalfen says to use symbols as a point on entry into wedding dreams; when you thinking a wedding it usually means commitment, and if you dream of someone without a face it could be that you are thinking of or have commited to something new in your life: a job, a move, getting a pet, starting a new routine. Consider how you feel in the dream about marrying this faceless person: are you excited? Scared and overwhelmed? Is dream you filled with happiness or dread? This could provide some insight into whether or not the new commitment is a good idea.
What does it mean if you dream about getting married but you don’t see marriage as part your future?
So you dream of a big white dress and a multi-tiered cake... except you’re not interested in getting married. Well, maybe in your waking life you’re considering doing something you thought you’d never do. Dalfen suggests asking the following questions: Who are you marrying in the dream? What comes to mind when you think of marriage? Is it something you look forward to doing? Is it something you say you would never do?
“Let’s imagine the dreamer responds to me she plans on never getting married... Since dreamwork is always about linking the dream to the waking situation that triggered it in the first place, my question to that dreamer is going to begin with the following: What situation in your life this week has you doing something you imagined you would never do? Stay open. The answer will probably have nothing whatsoever to do with marriage… The real event [for example] was how the dreamer joined a gym, something she swore to herself she would never do,” Delfan says.
So if you dream of getting married it could be because you’re experiencing (totally normal) jitters about planning a wedding. But more likely it could also be that the person you’re marrying in the dream is revealing something about your or your life that you need to see.