Hotter Than Cocoa

These 15 Holiday Erotica Books Will Land You Straight On The Naughty List

And there’s no place you’d rather be.

by Cat Bowen
Updated: 
Originally Published: 
The Spirit Of The Holidays
We may receive a portion of sales if you purchase a product through a link in this article.

As a longtime lover of smutty books, there’s perhaps nothing more fun to me than a holiday-themed erotica. It combines a few of my favorite things: hot sex, romance, and of course, terrible holiday puns about jingling balls and creamy frosting.

The holidays themselves, especially for moms like us, can be stressful and challenging, so why not end your day — or start it — by reading a book where Santa is a sexy god who can do wicked things in the snow, instead of just a guy you’re a little worried about having your kids hang out with at the mall. Holiday-themed smut takes you away from the difficult bits of the season by sending you squarely into the hard parts. (This will not be the last bad joke, I apologize.)

The past few years there has been a real bumper crop of wonderful, smuttastic holiday offerings. There’s the paranormal stories, like the Santa book I mentioned earlier, loads of “why choose,” aka “reverse harem” stories, monster porn (orcs, demons, the odd cthulhu), and of course, all of the tropes: stories full of fake dating, couples who are snowed in, surprise pregnancies, age gap romances, repressed Jewish queers who celebrate Hanukkah with latkes and fisting — you know, all the usual suspects. I’ve pretty much read them all, and the old axiom of “there’s something for everyone” definitely applies. Gay, straight, bi, poly, pan, cis and not, with virtually all of the winter holidays represented.

For this list, I’m giving books the following ratings:

🌶️ For sizzling spice. These books are lightly smutty. There’s on-page sex, but it’s not especially kinky or graphic.

🌶️🌶️ For steamier picks: maybe there’s a little bondage or kink, or perhaps this erotica is just very descriptive.

🌶️🌶️🌶️ For full-out, potentially kinky, bring it on, I-shouldn’t-read-this-in-public, is-it-hot-in-here, where-is-my-vibrator, holiday erotica.

The titles below are listed in heat level order and include themes, Kindle Unlimited availability, and trigger warnings where applicable. Go ahead and dive right in.

1

Big Nick Energy

Spice rating: 🌶️

If you want your sexy books to also make you swoon so hard you might just fall off of your chair, this is the one for you. It’s going to grab you by your mom heart and squeeze.

What if a Tinder date who you didn’t have notable chemistry with, but is a good guy, insisted that you and your two daughters have Thanksgiving with his family so that you don’t spend your first post-divorce Thanksgiving all alone? You may begrudgingly go. You may also find that your Tinder date’s dad is a real hottie built like every erotic fantasy of a cowboy you’ve ever had, and he’s also the sweetest. There’s only one answer: you lasso his golden retriever behind and saddle up.

This book is very vanilla, but the swoony-lovey nature of it, and the wild chemistry makes the sex so much hotter.

TW: domestic violence, scared children, family abandonment

Themes: age-gap, found family

Available on Kindle Unlimited? Yes

2

The Midnight Village

Spice rating: 🌶️

Star is a talented baker who unfortunately has had a spate of bad luck. Feeling drawn to the hamlet of Midnight for its notoriously mysterious ways, Star moves to the sleepy town in the middle of December and finds her world gets tossed upside-down: there’s a curse, the town is full of magic she never knew existed, and the town’s secretive mayor, Wolf, makes Bright wonder what kind of wand he’s working with.

If you’ve ever wondered what it would be like to be dumped into the world of Practical Magic, but with loads more sexual tension and steamy scenes, this book is for you. It’s a fun story with a very found-magic, Harry Pottery vibe that feels just right for this festive time of year.

Themes: grumpy/sunshine, magic

Available on Kindle Unlimited? Yes

3

Eight Nights in December

Spice rating: 🌶️

Lucas is sharing a room with his roommate’s brother, Nate, who is nothing like the rude and somewhat obnoxious man his roommate has painted him to be. Lucas is immediately taken with Nate and his quiet ways. Nate isn’t looking for anything serious, but the holiday season lights something from within him and he and Lucas can’t keep away from each other. It’s equal parts heartfelt and hot, and downright unputdownable.

This is a short read, and the oldest title on this list, but it felt important to add because this was the first gay Hanukkah book I’d ever read, and it made an impact on me. I think it will on you as well.

TW: homophobia

Themes: forced proximity

Available on Kindle Unlimited? Yes

4

A Holly Jolly Ever After

Spice rating: 🌶️🌶️

If you haven’t read anything by either Sierra Simone or Julie Murphy, then let me lay it out for you: these ladies write some seriously hot stuff. With their smutty brains working together? You may want to get a glass of ice water handy to cool off.

This story follows two actors, Winnie and Kallum, who are starring in a romantic holiday movie together and have a bit of history. One problem: Winnie can’t fake the pleasure she experiences while filming the hot scenes with Kallum because she’s never never felt this way before. Only one thing to do, right? Hands-on research! And who better to teach her than her sexy, experienced costar?

The spice in this book is steaming, but the sex itself is mostly vanilla, so that’s why I’m only giving it two chili peppers. It’s hotter than the great blue blazes, but you won’t find yourself gasping out loud in shock if you’re reading it at a coffee shop.

TW: cheating ex, purity culture, unplanned pregnancy, miscarriage scare, emotionally abusive ex, borderline abusive parents

Themes: friends to lovers, sex education, second chance

Available on Kindle Unlimited? No

5

Holiday Star

Spice rating: 🌶️🌶️

Have you ever had the opportunity to choose your own smutventure? This book has two versions you can choose from: open door and super spicy, or closed door with no spice. I can only speak to the spicy version because I did not read the sweet.

Gwen is a doctor who realizes that love is passing her by, and Caleb is the super famous nephew of her new stepdad. They find themselves unexpectedly spending the holidays together thanks to a bit of a miscommunication about about family-related holiday arrangements and and pretty soon, sparks fly. It’s a grumpy/sunshine, he-falls-first book with a touching storyline and off-the-charts hot sex.

If you like sweeter books with super spicy scenes, this might be what you’re looking for. It has the charm and happiness of Notting Hill, but the debauchery of Game of Thrones.

TW: cancer subplot, death of a parent, alcoholism

Themes: stepfamily, close quarters, grumpy/sunshine

Available on Kindle Unlimited? Yes

6

Merry Kiss Me

Spice rating: 🌶️🌶️

Second-chance, southern romance and a return-to-home story at Christmas? Sign me up. When culinary magazine editor Symone returns home to stop her mother from selling the family restaurant, she did not expect that it would be her old flame, Rhue, who’s trying to buy the business.

The holiday memories and celebrations make them remember what they had, but was it just in time for them to be torn apart again?

The book is seriously steamy, but also very sweet and joyful. You feel for Symone and the crisis of identity she endures as she battles with family and family history, and Rhue? He’s just delicious. When they get together it’s explosive, in more ways than one.

TW: alcoholism, child abuse/neglect, death of family member

Themes: returning home, second chance romance

Available on Kindle Unlimited? No

7

Wrap Me Up

Spice rating: 🌶️🌶️

Penny Reid is one of my “auto-buy” authors, and so is Sierra Simone, so when I saw that they joined together for a holiday anthology, I jumped to buy it.

Every story in this anthology is so well done and so steamy, but I want to focus on one of those stories right now: the Sierra Simone installment titled “My Present This Year” which is loosely based on the famous “my present this year” Folgers commercial that oh so many of us thought may have a bit of a sexual undertone. (Don’t worry, Sierra Simone doesn’t make them blood-related.)

In this story, the protagonists are stepsiblings, which is obviously still a bit taboo but better than we all assumed. She also gives her own magic to the story by making it set fire to the pages, which was a feat as I read it on my kindle. It’s kinky and wrong, and I loved every word.

Theme: stepfamily, forced proximity

Available on Kindle Unlimited? No

8

The Holly King's Sacrifice

Spice rating: 🌶️🌶️

No. Third. Act. Breakup. I repeat, no third act breakup! Plus, hot alien demon vikings, a witchy Yuletide theme, a strong heroine, and enough steam to melt the polar caps.

If you liked the highly praised Ice Planet Barbarians series by Ruby Dixon, you’ll love this book. It’s a sacrifice-themed book, where each year, a woman is offered up to a king, and this year, it’s Holly’s turn. She’s terrified of being sent to the demons of the north, but as you may expect, not everything is as it seems, and sometimes, the things you’re the most scared of are the things that are the very best.

There’s a bit of a slower burn in this one, and the author does a terrific job of putting the readers through their paces with a fraught beginning history between the two main characters drawing out the reader’s anticipation even though their pairing is essentially a foregone conclusion. It’s more about chemistry and connection during sex than overt smut, but a worthy read, to be sure

TW: mentions of death, disconnection from family

Themes: aliens, demons, yuletide, mating

Available on Kindle Unlimited? Yes

9

Mangos and Mistletoe

Spice rating: 🌶️🌶️

We love a competitors-to-lovers romance. Imagine Bake Off, but Scottish, and a lot more cutthroat — that’s the setting where our would-be lovers, Sully and Kiskeya find themselves. They both have a lot to prove, to themselves and to their families, but when they’re partnered up on the show, they find themselves heating up the kitchen with more than just their baking prowess.

There’s an oral scene in this book that had me taking notes. I think that Adriana Herrera might be the luckiest author on planet earth if she’s writing this experience from memory. If you have a vulva, I assure you, you will make your partner read this as I did, because that is exactly how we deserve to be treated every single time: just served up on a platter like a five-course meal at a Michelin star restaurant. Also, the descriptions of the food in this book made me as hungry for cake as I was for good oral, and I wasn’t mad about it.

TW: misogyny and homophobia, cultural arguments

Themes: Dominican families, FF, cooking, competitor-to-lover romance, forced proximity

Available on Kindle Unlimited? No

10

Santa Claus is Going to Town On Me

Spice rating: 🌶️🌶️

This novella went viral last year, earning M.L. Eliza legions of followers. Santa is a real, fantastical creature in this book, but he’s not the jolly fat guy you’re expecting. Nope, he’s a hot silver fox with magic hands and a really powerful candy cane.

Holly thinks Santa Claus is a burglar who is breaking and entering, but it turns out, he’s just letting himself into her home to drop off presents for her kids. (Which is, to be fair, breaking and entering.) He’s a real, magical, gift-giving man who can read her deepest, dirtiest thoughts, and make them come true. Sure, his ability to make it snow indoors is strange, but when a hot, burly guy is giving you the best orgasms of your life? You don’t question it. Luckily for both of them, their deepest desires aren’t all filthy, and a love story does develop, with a strangely convincing amount of chemistry.

It’s a short read that takes up less than an afternoon, but it’s darn well-written, very funny, and hotter than Santa’s cocoa.

TW: loss of parent, mention of car accident, overcoming grief

Themes: paranormal romance

Available on Kindle Unlimited? Yes

11

All I Want For Christmas Is Them

Spice rating: 🌶️🌶️

I know I’m not the only one who’s looked at their best friend and their lover and thought, I want to be the meat in that sandwich. This is the case for Otto who wants Diego, his best friend, and Otto’s girlfriend, Naomi.

The desire was so much that he had to find out how to make it happen. Lucky for all of us, he did just that. It’s a sexy MMF book with bisexual dude-on-dude action that has a tiny bit of kink, but mostly it’s just really hot. There’s a lot of merry Christmas events and general goofiness, but overall, it’s hot, it’s short, and almost wholesome. There are some seriously sad moments, though, so be prepared to be all in your feels.

TW: death in family, organ donation, child illness

Themes: MMF with MM scenes, friends to lovers

Available on Kindle Unlimited? Yes

12

Eight Kinky Nights

Spice rating: 🌶️🌶️🌶️

I could not love this book any more than I already do. As a queer, autistic, kinky Jew myself, it was so affirming to see my community represented so well, and also so hotly. Stone butch Jordan is recently divorced and moves in with queer femme Leah in New York City. Leah is a sexually submissive kink educator who falls somewhere on the graysexual/ace spectrum. Graysexuality, if you’re unfamiliar with the term, is someone who only sometimes experiences sexual attraction, and she’s a bit more towards the asexual or aromantic (someone who doesn’t form romantic attachments easily). She takes up the mantle of teaching Jordan how to embrace being a bit dominant, and perhaps polyamorous all over the course of the eight days of Hanukkah.

You have to love a book that essentially opens with a fisting scene. It’s just not something you get with most Hanukkah romances. And it’s strangely educational and hotter than it has any right to be. There is so much concern in this super-hot kinky book surrounding consent, and it makes it that much sexier. There are heavier topics in this book, like autistic meltdowns (been there a time or 20), PTSD, and dealing with a fat-shaming family, but when you get down to it, it’s just a couple of down-to-earth queers getting really kinky and falling for each other.

TW: suicide of parent, parental abuse, PTSD, autistic meltdowns, nonverbal episodes, fat shaming, TERFs

Themes: D/s (dominance and submission), Kink, polyamory, gender questioning, sexuality questioning

Available on Kindle Unlimited? No

13

From Snowball Fights to Hot Summer Nights

Spice rating: 🌶️🌶️🌶️

What if Santa was real, but it was an inherited title? What if there weren’t reindeer, but instead, magical men who worked to help deliver toys in magical, deer-free sleighs with Santa and shared the same names as the famous flyers? It’d be cool, right? Ok, now how would you feel if I told you that their come tasted like eggnog? Because that’s all happening in this book.

Dancer fills in as an erotic dancer at a nightclub, alongside his friend, Candace Cane. As he’s working, he feels drawn to both Candy and the quiet bouncer, Trevor, and they for him. One problem: Candy isn’t looking for a relationship, and when you’re in a place of strategic command for Santa, your life gets a little hectic.

It’s a full-length MMF erotic romance with a sex and fat-positive story, a little bit of kinky play, and so much eggnog-flavored you-know-what that I got a bit envious and asked my husband,“Why can’t your’s be holiday-beverage flavored?” To that he responded, “What in the heck are you reading?”

Themes: colleagues, will-they-or-won’t-they, exhibitionism

Available on Kindle Unlimited? Yes

14

Knotty Holiday Nights

Spice rating: 🌶️🌶️🌶️

If you’re even the tiniest bit curious about omegaverse novels, this holiday anthology is a great place to begin because you get to experience the themes in short, easy-to-digest bites (pun intended). Yes, there’s knotting and nesting and hot alpha-on-alpha action, but there’s also tinsel and cookies, which makes the setting more joyful and festive and, arguably, a lot less intimidating.

For those unfamiliar with the concept, the omegaverse is a world where shifters (or non shifters) line up in an alpha(dominant) and omega (submissive) pattern. Typically there is a pack of alphas who choose and mate with an omega. Those omegas form nests, get bitten and claimed, and go into heat when their alphas must “serve” them. While the genre isn’t for everyone, it’s darned entertaining, and I think most erotica lovers should give it a go at least once. (Much like monster smut!)

There’s a wide range of sexual preferences and kink levels with these authors, so expect everything from MM to FF to every varying combinations and groups of alphas and omegas. They’re hot, short, and to the point.

Themes: omegaverse, group penetration, sex in an altered state

Available on Kindle Unlimited? Yes

15

10 Inches

Spice rating: 🌶️🌶️🌶️

A journalist is given the keys to an exclusive beach house filled with ten hot men to research the size of their todgers (aka penis). All of them want to provide her with hands-on research instead of mere interviews. And they’re not making her choose between them, either.

Do not expect this book to be more than what it is. It’s an over-the-top, fun, and sexy book that takes your brain out of whatever it’s stuck on by living vicariously through a young journalist’s sexual shenanigans. At one point one of the love interests says, “use us like a stepladder and climb high,” which is only one of the ridiculous lines of dialogue you truly don’t care that much about because the smut is smutting so smutting hard. If you’re titillated by more extreme sex including double penetration and double vaginal penetration, you’re in for a great time with this one.

TW: attempted sexual assault (brief),

Themes: why choose, articles Cat should be assigned, crossing swords

Available on Kindle Unlimited? Yes

This article was originally published on