The first time I tried to get a baby to stop crying was the night my brother and sister-in-law left my niece with my partner and I for a few hours. She was 3 months old, exclusively breastfed, never had a bottle, and had never really been alone with anyone else. A recipe for success, right? Not so much. It only took 20 minutes before I was desperately trying the things every mom does when she's trying to get her kid to stop crying. Unfortunately, though, none of those things actually worked.
I ended up taking her out in stroller for a walk around the block, and eventually abandoned that plan for fear the neighbors would think I was torturing an infant. In the end, I channeled my best Aunt Monica from Friends, in which she comforts Rachel's newborn with that annoying shushing noise every mom uses while simultaneously hating. Eventually, we had a calm niece and I had a glimpse into what trying to comfort a newborn is really like. I can't say the same "shushing" trick always worked with my daughter, although the first thing she did when she got a baby doll was start patting its back and repeatedly shush over and over again, so perhaps it sunk in subconsciously.
For all those moms battling crying babes at the moment, you're not alone. It's not easy, to be sure, but if you try a few (or all, or a combination) of the following "please dear child stop crying" tactics, you might just find yourself in a quiet room, with a peaceful baby by your side.