I can think of few more vulnerable situations than that of a laboring mother in a delivery room. You're likely in pain, you're excited and nervous, and you're entirely focused on what you're doing. In such an intense situation, the social niceties we usually rely on to perpetuate a polite and civil society go right out the window. Just whoosh. Sailing on out the window and you DGAF. After it happens, however, it's like, "Oh. That was sort of humiliating." I asked moms to share the most embarrassing thing they said during labor and delivery, because other people's social faux pas are hilarious.
Lest I be accused of exploiting other people for personal advancement, I'll go first. When I had my son he was born with strawberry blonde hair. My husband and I both have black hair, so we assumed our kid would, too, and had mentioned it to my OB-GYN. After extracting him from womb via c-section, however, my doctor declared, "He's so light!" In an attempt at a self-deprecating joke riffing on mine and my husband's own pallid complexions, I replied, "He comes from a long and proud line of very white people." In the post-delivery haze, however, I realized that the way I'd said it could be interpreted as pretty unwoke, to say the least. Like, "We're White and we're proud!" (As a reminder: "white pride" is always creepy.) Of course I immediately panicked thinking, "Oh God, does my Asian doctor and numerous non-white nurses think I'm racist? Noooooooo!" so I quickly added "Pasty, I mean. Pasty! We're really pasty!"
I was seriously smooth, you guys. Yikes. I still get full body shudders thinking about it (though, fortunately, I think everyone involved was picking up what I was putting down). Fortunately, I'm in good company when it comes to really embarrassing labor and delivery moments. #Solidarity