Life
26 'Hocus Pocus' Quotes For Instagram That Will Put A Spell On You
It's no secret that Hocus Pocus is the greatest Halloween movie of all time — at least to millennials. And you know what millennials like? Instagram. So you totally need these 26 Hocus Pocus quotes for Instagram for all of your Halloween pics this year, right? It's obviously timely (because, duh, everyone you know will be watching this movie on repeat all October long), it's a cult classic, and it's super quotable.
The best inspo for Halloween pictures will of course come from the Halloween queens themselves — the Sanderson sisters. But I have to say I was pretty impressed at how savage Dani actually was the entire movie from looking at her quotes. I didn't realize it as much when I was a kid, but looking back, she takes zero crap. And I love that in a kid. She is also the perfect Halloween Instagram caption inspo, or any kind of inspo really if you're trying to be a bada** confident woman who knows what she wants. After all, when your brother is a "little leaguer" of course you feel protected and confident enough to say whatever you want. As long as Sarah, Winnie, and Mary aren't around trying to get you to drink that nasty green potion. And if she had an Instagram, I believe she'd be using these quotes, too, now that the witches are dead and everything is OK again.
1“You know I’ve always wanted a child. And now I think I’ll have one… on toast!” — Winifred
Totally how I feel some days. This would be a great caption for a photo of your kid getting into some Halloween mischief.
2‘It’s the chocolate-covered finger of a man named Clark.’ – Mary
Apparently, Clark Bars are coming back, so you definitely have to snag one and take a picture of you holding it with this caption.
3“It’s a full moon tonight. That’s when all the weirdos are out.” – Dani
Truth. Take a full moon pic and you're golden with this quote.
4"They call me master." – Satan
Perfect for those dressed up as Satan for Halloween. My favorite line after? "Wait until you see what I'm gonna call ya."
5“Use iodized salt to ward off witches, zombies, and old boyfriends.” – Allison
Back in the 17th and 18th century, people made "witch bottles" or "witch balls" with salt in them for protection against witches, according to History Daily. If you feel so inclined, perhaps you should make one for yourself for Halloween night. And then obviously take a picture of you wearing it for your Instagram and use this quote.
6“My lucky rat tail... it’s just where I left it!” – Sarah
All you need is a fake rat, and to be dressed as a witch. Bonus points if you bite the tail like Sarah did. Yuck.
7"Twist the bones and bend the back, give him fur, black as black." – Sanderson Sisters
I just might use this quote and post a picture of my beloved black cat Molly on Instagram. When she greets trick-or-treaters at the door they're terrified, and they're also terrified if they see her in the window. Remember guys, that's just a superstition and please be nice to the kitties. And if you have a black cat, be sure to keep them inside for Halloween. Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.
8Amuck! Amuck, amuck, amuck, amuck..." – Sarah
This was my favorite line when I was a kid. Are your kids running amuck or acting like, well, kids having fun on Halloween? Snap a pic, use this as your caption.
9‘Mmm, mmm, mmm! I need one of those instant ice packs. You girls are giving me a fever!’ – Bus Driver
Feeling particularly witchy and sexy this Halloween? Snap a photo with your besties and use this caption. "Yow!"
10Sarah: “Thou wouldst hate me in the morning.” Bus Driver: “No I wouldn’ts.”
This would be cute for a couple's picture — no matter if you're dressed like Sarah and the bus driver.
11“I am beautiful! Boys will LOVE me!” – Sarah
Feeling cute? Don't delete later, but use this caption on your Instagram photo for Halloween.
12"It's the one night of the year when the spirits of the dead can return to Earth." — Allison
This just may be the most perfect Halloween caption ever.
13“Bubble, bubble, I’m in trouble.” – Bus driver
For a witchy, flirty picture with your bae.
14“I smell... children.” – Mary
I think this would be a super cute caption of a photo of your kids in their Halloween costumes.
15"Oh look. Another glorious morning. Makes me sick!" - Winifred
Take that perfect Halloween sunrise photo and caption it with this. I feel this way most days, to be honest.
16“It’s just a bunch of hocus pocus!” – Max
...or is it?
17“Drop dead. Moron.” – Dani
This caption would be perfect for the haters any old day of the year. Again, Dani is savage. I can feel the burn.
18"I put a spell on you, and now you're mine." — Winifred
Doing some spooky witchy stuff this Halloween? I think this caption would be a good fit.
19Ernie 'Ice': “Gee, we don't get any smokes from you. We don't get any cash. What am I supposed to do with my afternoon?” Max: “Maybe you could learn to breathe through your nose.”
No clue what you'd take a photo of for this caption, but it's literally my most favorite quote from the entire movie.
20Max: “Dani, this is the girl of my dreams.” Dani: “Then take her to the movies like a normal person.”
Couples photo caption for the win. Especially if you're at a haunted house. Or, you know, the Sanderson Sisters' house about to light the black flame candle.
21“And I thought LA was a party town.” – Dave
Have a photo of a killer Halloween party and everyone's dancing their butts off? Perfect caption.
22Dani: “I love you jerkface.” Max: “I love you too.”
My husband and I literally quote this all the time after we have a fight. And sometimes just in general. #relationshipgoals?
23“Come! We fly!” – Winifred
Grab some girlfriends and some brooms and snap a photo.
24“Hello, I want my book. Bonjour, je veux mon livre.” – Winifred
Whether you're taking a selfie at the library, or if you're dressed as Winifred, this quote will always be hilarious and on point.
25Jay: “Well then, you think of something!” Ernie (Ice): "Look, I don’t feel so good.” Jay: “It’s because you’re eating too much candy, you oinker!”
The best caption for showcasing your Halloween haul this year. I mean your kids' candy. Yes, that's it. Except mom gets all the Reese's, it's the law. Sorry kiddo.
26"How many times I gotta tell you, my name ain't Ernie no more. It's Ice.” – Ernie (Ice)
"This is Ice."