There are some things that we simply know to be facts: Knowing how to discipline children is trial and error; The Beatles will always be awesome; Ice cream tastes better out of a cone; Children behave best when their moms aren’t around; And, of course, introverts are better in bed. In fact, I'm pretty sure being fantastic in bed is one of the signs you might be an introvert.

Many people think being an introvert means someone is shy or quiet. This is not necessarily the case. What it means to be an introvert is that you derive your energy from being alone, whereas extroverts derive energy from being around others. Being an introvert doesn’t mean you’re huddled in the corner at parties (though we do tend to love a good vantage point). It means that if you’re going to attend a party, you probably need to read a book by yourself before and after in order to maintain your sanity.

So how would being energized by alone time make a person know how to be better in bed? We introverts are a rare and special breed of people. We take our time with letting people in. We realize that each conversation and interaction is a deliberate use of energy. If we choose to invest in your company, it’s an actual investment of ourselves. While this can make us reclusive friends with a tendency to vanish, it means that when we let you in, you get an intensified version of intimacy. Here are a few reasons introverts are better in bed:

We've Thought About It

People who spend more time alone and genuinely enjoy the company of their own thoughts have a tendency to think through things before making a decision. So when it comes to sex, if we're doing it, we have certainly thought about it. Sometimes this means we’ve thought about sex with you specifically, and the sex is a culmination of that particular desire; Other times, it means we’ve taken the time to know what we want in general, and both of us are about to reap the rewards of that contemplation when we jump into bed together.

We Chose You

Introverts choose whom we give our energy to. If you are uninteresting or don’t manage to stimulate us, we will stop exerting our precious energy on you. Time with others is exhausting, so when we make a deliberate choice to spend time with you — naked, hot time with you — you can be assured we are completely into everything we're feeling with you.

We Know What We Want

Introverts very rarely make decisions based on the moods of others. We tend to take our alone time and develop (and OK, sometimes over-develop) a sense of self and certainty about what we like and don’t. Because this is something we craft in our alone time, it’s authentically us. When we like you or the way you do certain things in the bedroom (or the kitchen, or the elevator, or that lovely beach in Croatia) we are all in for the experience. We know what we want and if we’ve chosen to want you, you better believe it will be at full intensity.

We're Good With Silence


Restricting certain senses can increase the capacity of other senses. For example: Removing sound can intensify touch. It's not that we are universally a breed of human who are opposed to a little dirty talk in bed, but if that's not in the cards, we definitely aren't going to argue with keeping things hush and focus on, um, other forms of communication. Aren't you glad introverts are good with the occasional silent adult time?

We Spend Time With Ourselves

A solid 86% of good sex (yes, I made that statistic up) is about being comfortable in your own skin and knowing what you like. If you know yourself well enough to guide your partner, the sex is going to be better; mind-blowingly better. When you spend time figuring out what works for you, you're able to plunge into the awkward, intense, fearsome world of sex without getting hung up on trying to find the right spot for you. And learning to navigate the waters is something that must be done alone. So, when I say we spend time with ourselves, please understand that I mean ~*~we spend time with ourselves~*~. Climbing in bed with an introvert is like climbing into a world you’ve never seen before and since we're well-acquainted with the terrain, we're more than happy to be your guide.