The secret to more intense orgasms isn’t something that has to take years or even months to learn. Although it can take a while to truly learn what you like — and what you don’t — you can also start to improve your orgasms in as little as one day. Better climaxes can be yours today. For real.
You have a lifetime to learn the ins and outs of your wants and desires. And, chances are, those carnal needs will change over time. What you like now is probably different from what you liked five years ago, and chances are it’s also different from what you’ll be into in a decade. But if you’re having lackluster orgasms, it can make sex — or masturbation — seem unappealing. Maybe it’s not that you don’t enjoy getting off, but the routine has made it seem rote, tired, humdrum. Maybe you know that stronger orgasms are out there, but you’re not sure how to find them.
If you want to add some spark to your finish, all it takes is a little creativity and shaking a few things up. You don’t need whipped cream, handcuffs, or latex if you don’t want them — mind-blowing orgasms can be achieved with some good, old fashioned fun and a sense of adventure.
1. Watch Some Porn
A 2008 study found visual stimulation can boost your arousal level, making your big O more intense. So stream a film or flip through a magazine. Either way, you're helping your Os.
2. Use A Vibrator
If you usually masturbate with your digits or have sex with your partner sans toys, adding some battery powered stimulation can help take your climax to the next level.
3. Change The Scenery
Are you always getting busy in the same place? Try changing locations for a little added adrenaline boost and a more powerful orgasm.
4. Try Anal Stimulation
When in doubt, put something in your butt. Emma Kaywin, a Brooklyn-based sexual health writer and activist, wrote for Bustle that your anus is full of nerve endings, which create a spike in pleasure. Just be sure to use lube and go slowly so you don’t hurt yourself.
5. Tell Your Partner *Exactly* What You Want
Partners aren’t mind readers, so if you’d really like to be touched a little harder, a little to the left, try communicating that to your boo. If you’re being touched exactly where and how you like it, you’re likely to get off hard.
6. Take Pressure Off Yourself To Get There
When you’re so focused on finishing, it can sometimes become an impossible task. Instead of focusing on the end goal, try to concentrate on what you’re feeling right then. Getting lost in the sensations may help your orgasm be less elusive.
7. Don’t Apologize For Your Desires
Oftentimes, women are taught to be ashamed of the things we want in the bedroom. You may feel embarrassed or apologetic, which not only means that you’re not getting what you want, but that you’re mentally removed from the action. Try to take ownership of what you want; it will make it that much more intense when you get it.
8. Get Into Foreplay
Susan Quilliam, Durex Embrace’s sex & relationship expert, told WeWoman that foreplay increases anticipation and build up, which creates a stronger orgasm. "Whole body massage, genital stroking and licking, delaying your orgasm - all of these will remind your libido what good sex is really like," she said. So don't be shy when it comes to asking for a little pre-action action.