Before I had kids, I thought I knew it all. Sure, babies are notorious for avoiding sleep, but my babies would effortlessly sleep through the night. And yes, some parents find it difficult to be both firm and fair with their kids, but me? Ha, that's child's play. And those moms trying to comfort their tantrum-throwing toddlers at the local supermarket? That would never be me. Sure, some of the aforementioned are lies we all tell ourselves before procreating, but there were a lot of stupid things I said about raising toddlers that were just plain ignorant and arrogant. In the end, though, I got what I deserved
Here's the thing about raising toddlers: they're wildly unpredictable mini-humans with no hold on their big, or small, emotions. I remember babysitting cousins or children of friends long before I had my own kids, thinking "this is so easy." But babysitting is only "easy" because they're not your kids, and you're only responsible for them for a short amount of time. When you're parenting a toddler every hour of every day, you realize how quickly their moods can change. You are privy to the horror that is offering a 2-year-old a red sippy cup instead of a blue sippy cup, and the meltdown that follows. You are the one that has to say no when they keep asking to eat the same chocolate bar over and over again, so you're the one they grow increasingly angry at until their emotions transform your sweet cherub into a demon child.
Now that I've raised two toddlers-turned-children, I know better. But back then? Ha. I was so naive and clueless and incapable of imagining just how taxing raising a toddler can be. So with that in mind, and because at least someone should benefit from my hard-earned knowledge, here's what I said about toddlers before I was responsible for one: