For many folks, the holidays invoke a warm and fuzzy feeling, along with the need to watch light-hearted movies centered around the magical holiday season. For others, not so much. Some people don’t like the fluff, or at the very least, need a break from all the “ho, ho, ho” and good cheer. And there are movies for these people. While I’m not saying these are Oscar-worthy films, if you like weird horror-inspired or edgy Christmas movies that are a little more hardcore than Rudolph, these are some Christmas horror movies for the creepy child inside of you who wants it to be Halloween all year round.
In most of these movies, Santa is no longer the warm, jolly, plump and loveable bowl full of jelly. There are evil murderer Santas, and even alcoholic, dirty, and nymphomaniac Santas. And this particular Jack Frost isn't the one from the sweet Michael Keaton movie. No, this snowman is out for blood and is pretty gruesome. And the smiley gingerbread man you know and love is now a stone cold killer. Grab some spiked eggnog, and make sure the kiddos are tucked into bed tight before you cozy up to any of these spooky horror holiday movies. Otherwise, they may be having nightmares for years to come, and you'll definitely have to tell them the truth about Santa Claus then so they won't think he's lurking in the closet with a hatchet.
1'Christmas Evil' (1980)
As a child, it's pretty traumatic when you find out Santa Claus isn't real, am I right? But most children get over it. Unfortunately, this particular toy factory worker never gets over it, and he tries to make his life follow the Christmas spirit as closely as possible by obsessing over children's behavior and his toy-making quality. After being belittled at work about his toy-making skills, he has a nervous breakdown and kills everyone in his path.
Buy this movie on DVD or Blu-Ray on Amazon.
2'Silent Night, Deadly Night' (1984)
This movie is all kinds of creepy, as it is centered around a teenage boy who goes on a killing spree dressed as Santa Claus. Why is he so murderous and deranged? Oh, he was abused by the Mother Superior at the orphanage he lived in after both of his parents were murdered. In front of him. What sets him off? He sees two people having sex in the department store where he works as a Santa Claus. And there are several installments of this ongoing story for you to enjoy if you feel like binge watching them to really get you into the holiday spirit.
Rent this movie on Google Play, iTunes, or Vudu.
3'Bad Santa' (2003)
This particular Santa is a sex-addicted, alcoholic creep played by none other than Billy Bob Thornton. There's even a poor little overweight boy who thinks this monster is the real Santa Claus and believes he's his only friend, even when "Santa" takes advantage of his kindness and sweetness. This "Bad Santa" apparently comes around in the end and helps the kid out, but it really just can't make up for all the grossness this Santa has done the entire movie. If you're up for crude college humor and ruining childhoods, this movie is for you.
Stream Bad Santa now on Netflix, Hulu, Google Play, Vudu, and iTunes.
4'Jack Frost' (1997)
No, not that Jack Frost. This Jack Frost was a murderer who was left for dead in "genetic material," according to IMDB. He returns as an evil snowman who is seeking revenge on the man who sent him to execution. It's a horror-comedy so expect a lot of corny one-liners, over-the-top gore, and cheesy special effects.
Stream Jack Frost now on Amazon Prime or Vudu, or rent on Amazon.
Feel like you've lost your Christmas spirit this year? Well, "you better watch out, you better not cry, better not pout, I'm telling you why," Krampus is coming to town to punish you. This movie focuses on the Engel family whose holiday spirit has wavered, so Krampus comes to punish and kill them by murdering them one by one. Krampus the "Christmas Devil" is a horned, demon figure who is a part of Germanic folklore, and is known as Santa's counterpart who punishes bad children and non-believers by beating them with sticks or eating them.
You can stream Krampus on HBO Now, HBO Go, or rent via Amazon, Vudu, and iTunes.
6'Black Christmas' (1974)
What screams horror movie more than a group of sorority sisters being stalked and murdered? These girls keep getting weird phone calls from a "moaner," who cackles, cries and screams on the other line. When they're trying to figure out who it is, one by one, the girls all over town are getting murdered left and right over Christmas break. This movie is creepy AF, and the camera work really gets you involved and into the mind of the killer. Kind of like the original Halloween, in my opinion. This Canadian psychological actually seems quite good if you're into scary movies.
Stream Black Christmas on Showtime, or rent it on Google Play, Vudu, or iTunes.
7'Santa’s Slay' (2005)
In this movie, not only is Santa not a real guy who brings toys and happiness to children all over the world, but he's Satan. That's right, Satan. It's so bad, it's almost good in it's cheesy horror style with creative killings and stupid one liners. This Santa is kind of reminiscent of the Robot Santa Claus in Futurama and the premise is similar as well. He kills everyone, whether they're naughty or nice and uses explosives, among other weapons. Of course Fran Drescher is in this movie, and plus, Santa is played by professional wrestler Bill Goldberg. What could be more entertaining than that?
Rent Santa's Slay on Amazon, Google Play, Vudu, or iTunes.
Nothing quite screams Christmas and holiday cheer like Nazis. This 1989 horror movie focuses on teenager Kristen, who ends up being part of a modern day Neo-Nazi plot after she accidentally slices open her hand during a pagan ritual that was decidedly anti-Christmas. And instead of Aryans, it turns out Hitler wanted a master race of elf-human hybrid monstrosities. And the only person who can save Kristen and the world as we know it? The biggest elf of all, Santa Claus.
Unfortunately, it looks like this holiday classic is only available on VHS, so it may be time to dust off that old VCR.
9'The Gingerdead Man' (2005)
Y'all, this movie has Gary Busey in it as the Gingerdead Man. I just had to get that out there first. OK, this horror-comedy movie is based in Waco, Texas, where the cremated ashes of a murderer ends up in some gingerbread spice mix. After a bakery employee finds this mixture, and starts preparing it, he accidentally cuts himself, getting his blood into the dough. Another bakery worker, unaware of the blood and ashes, bakes a larger than life gingerbread man. This gingerbread man comes to life via an electric current as the former killer, and he wreaks havoc again with all the cheesy one-liners and corny gore you could ever want.
Also, if this movie wasn't enough, there are apparently two follow-ups, Gingerdead Man 2 and Gingerdead Man 3, in case you haven't had your fill of cheesy comedy-horror gore that is filmed and directed like those old horror movies.
Stream this holiday magic on Hulu.
If you're tired of the same old sweet and cheerful holiday favorites, these creep-tacular movies may be worth watching and starting a new tradition of your own. Save those Tim Allen movies for the kids, this is definitely adult time.
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