If I woke up with head sewn to the carpet, I wouldn't be more surprised than I am right now to see this National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation Build-A-Bear. There are photos of me as a kid watching the iconic Christmas Vacation movie when it was literally nowhere near Christmastime, and the Griswold family and all of their extended relatives have a deep seat in my heart. (It helps that my dad is basically Clark W. Griswold himself, but still.) But when I saw this Build-A-Bear collection, I literally gasped. It's just not a fun-filled, good old-fashioned family Christmas without Cousin Eddie, and now he's a snuggly bear you can carry around (without needing the filthy RV).
This limited edition Christmas Vacation bear is inspired by the 1989 film, and is a 16" brown teddy bear with green paws and a Christmas Vacation logo on the chest. For $29 you can buy just the bear, but if you want him to look like Cousin Eddie (obviously), you'll need to purchase Christmas Vacation robe set which features Cousin Eddie's famous hat and robe. You know, the outfit he was wearing when the sh*tter was full. Together, Build-A-Bear is selling the bundle for $51, but if you already have a bear at home that could use Cousin Eddie's get-up, you can purchase the outfit for $22.
Both the bear and the outfit are online exclusives, which means if you want this particular bear to have a sound or scent — both of which you can add in a Build-A-Bear store — you'll have to pass. Although to be honest, what exactly would you make Cousin Eddie the stuffed bear say that wasn't absolutely offensive? "Real nice, Clark," would be my own personal choice. Or "Now don't go fallin' in love with it. 'Cause we're taking it with us when we leave here next month."
Look, Christmas Vacation is in my blood. It courses through my body brighter than Clark's light display. I need this bear. I'd prop him up in the living room as I decorated the tree, set him next to the eggnog at our annual tacky Christmas sweater party with his own moose mug, leave him in the front yard with the hose so it looks like he's emptying toxic waste into the sewer — the possibilities are absolutely endless. And if you have kids who haven't seen Christmas Vacation yet (trust me, they forget all the swear words eventually), this is the perfect way to introduce them to the entire gang. Cousin Eddie is obviously one of the most memorable characters in the film, and it'll be more exciting than sledding with a plastic plate in your head to add this bear to your holiday collection.
Cousin Eddie is more than just a comedy bit though. He does have quite the heart. Who else will kidnap your boss on Christmas Eve to give you as a gift? Who else tries to save a chair that literally had a cat explode in it for the sake of thriftiness? Does anyone else ask you to buy yourself something "real nice, Clark" when they're Christmas shopping for your family? Cousin Eddie is pure, and if anyone deserves a Build-A-Bear, it's him. (But hey, if you're listening, an Aunt Bethany bear would be great. "That was fun! I love riding in cars!")