People love to voice their opinions about your parenting decisions, but nothing beats the comments people say to breastfeeding moms. Not only are they often rude or demeaning, but sometimes they are seriously creepy. I personally have a hard time dealing with someone saying the first thing that comes to mind, but if you know how to respond to creepy things people say to breastfeeding moms, you can shut them down very quickly.
Because in reality? There is absolutely no reason for anybody to comment on you breastfeeding your child, especially if it's a creepy statement. What matters is that you're feeding your baby and if the rest of the world could get on board with that, you wouldn't need to know how to handle the creeps out there. But unfortunately, if you're a breastfeeding mom, there's a chance you're going to need one of these 13 responses at some point. Not only do people think they are allowed to speak their mind, but I think most of them either expect you to be ashamed, embarrassed, or to agree with their statement.
Well mama didn't raise no fool, did she? So put the creepy talkers back in place with any of these 13 responses. Hold your head high, keep feeding your baby, and make those people feel as small as they are for having the audacity to say anything to you about breastfeeding your child.
1. "You Can Eat Your Lunch On The Toilet If You Want."
Don't you love it when people suggest that you feed your baby in a filthy public bathroom? Let them know that it's much easier to balance a salad on your knee while squatting over the toilet than breastfeeding a baby in there. I mean, if the problem is seeing your breast while they're eating, that's a viable option right?
2. "Why Are You Staring At My Breasts?"
Just shout it every time someone even dares to suggest something like, "Why aren't you covered up?"
3. "Are You Sexualizing My Child's Nourishment?"
Because chances are, someone's going to ask you if it feels good to breastfeed, if it turns you on, if you think it will make your child more attracted to women, and so on. So just ask them this and they'll (hopefully) realize they are being a total creep.
4. "You Realize We Are Different People, Right?"
For the people who say things like, "Oh I could never breastfeed" or "I was never comfortable just showing my breast to everyone." Everybody seems to forget that people are not all wired exactly the same.
5. "Except Sex Doesn't Feed A Child."
There is nothing more infuriating than people comparing breastfeeding in public to sex in public. Sex doesn't feed a child, idiots. But breastfeeding does. Now shut up.
6. "Sure, Let Me Make My Baby Uncomfortable For Your Sake."
The world seems to forget that breastfeeding's main focus is on feeding a baby. A sweet, innocent, little child who did not ask for you to intervene in their biological needs.
7. "Do You Think Victoria's Secret Ads Will Make Your Child A Creep, Too?"
Because someone is always wondering if you breastfeeding your child means your baby will grow up to be some kind of maniac obsessed with breasts and doing everything they can to get their hands on some.
8. "You See More Of Me In My Bikini Actually."
I hate when people say breastfeeding is revealing. It's not. You literally see less of my boobs while I'm breastfeeding than you do in my bikini top.
9. "My Partner Believes In Feeding Our Baby."
I remember dating my boyfriend while I was still breastfeeding and everyone wanted to know what he thought about it. He and I never discussed it because, honestly, I figured he believed in not letting a baby starve and that was enough for me.
10. "Literally None Of This Is Your Business."
Literally, none of it. Whether someone is telling you to cover up, asking how long you're going to breastfeed, or questioning you on your sex life, this response works.
11. "I Don't Like Looking At You, But I Can't Make You Leave The Mall."
You know, for those who think they have a say in what you do and want you to leave an area because you're making them uncomfortable.
12. "Maybe They Won't Grow Up To Be A Jerk Like You."
Someone asked me once if I breastfed in front of other children. Like, why is this even a question that has to be asked? My baby didn't care if other kids were around — when she was hungry, she was hungry. But maybe letting other children see breastfeeding as a natural thing will make sure they don't grow up to be total jerks like their parents.
13. "Stop Talking."
It just works for everything. Don't even let them finish talking before you say it.