One of the biggest lies moms-to-be are told is how "easy" breastfeeding will be. The truth is, breastfeeding isn't effortless or "natural" for all moms or all babies. I have breastfed three babies to varying degrees of success, and learned firsthand that there's really no way to predict how nursing will go. Or is there? I mean, what if you can tell how your baby will breastfeed, according to their Zodiac sign? I thought it was totally worth exploring, because desperate times call for desperate measures, my friends.
I checked out the website Astrology Zodiac Signs, and was surprised to find that my kids' astrological profiles were pretty spot on when it comes to their temperament, personality, sleep, and yes, their breastfeeding, too. My daughter is a Gemini through and through — especially when it came to breastfeeding. She both hated being left alone (and wanted to be attached to my breast all night long), but also hated being confined, so would spend most nights kicking me in the ribs or face. She hated routines, so she would be hungry every three hours one day, every hour the next, and just when I was would start to think she was finally sleeping through the night without a meal. To this day she still has two distinct personalities.
My oldest son was super particular about his eating routine. He liked to be held in a certain way, and preferred a quiet space to nursing in public, which makes sense for a calm, but obsessive Scorpio. Again, his astrological profile is absolutely accurate. I also learned that my youngest son is an Aquarius, so it makes perfect sense that he is friendly and affectionate, but hates being bored. This was definitely true for his breastfeeding style. He loved to smile up at me and gaze adoringly at me while he nursed, but he also constantly wanted to shift positions.
So, if you are interested in a little insight from the stars about about how your baby will breastfeed, read on. And trust me, when breastfeeding's concerned, every little bit of information helps.
Capricorn (December 22 - January 19)
Capricorns are disciplined and reliable. When it comes to breastfeeding, your Capricorn baby is likely to be all work and no fuss, eating at the same times every day like clockwork, which can make setting routines easy, but deviating from them challenging.
Aquarius (January 20 - February 18)
According to Astrology Zodiac Signs, "The biggest problem for Aquarius-born is the feeling that they are limited or constrained." So, yeah, unless you want to stay home all of the time, you had better get used to nursing in public, because your Aquarius baby will scream if you even think about putting a nursing cover over their head.
Pisces (February 19 - March 20)
According to Astrology Zodiac Signs, people born under this sign are pretty much the friendliest, most even-tempered people around. When it comes to breastfeeding, your Pisces baby is likely to be a gentle, calm angel.
Aries (March 21 - April 19)
Aries are passionate, enthusiastic, determined folks with a tendency to be impatient and aggressive. Your Aries baby's latch might resemble a barracuda, because chances are they're going to clamp down hard. Your poor nipples.
Taurus (April 20 - May 20)
Your Taurus baby is patient, but stubborn. Once you both figure breastfeeding out, the same routine will work every time. They are also known to be sensual, tactile folks, so you might consider adding some little skin-to-skin snuggling to your nursing routine.
Gemini (May 21 - June 20)
My daughter is a textbook Gemini — curious and affectionate, but also indecisive and anxious. According to Astrology Zodiac Signs, Geminis are twins in that they have dual personalities. I can attest to the fact, because you absolutely never know what you are going to get with a Gemini. Seriously. Some days, she loved breastfeeding, and others, well, not so much. Fortunately for us, her dual personality made her very adaptable. So, she was able to transition from breast to bottle like a champ.
Cancer (June 21 - July 22)
As a Cancer myself, I am sorry to report that we are more than a little bit crabby. So when your Cancer baby is hungry, they will let you know. They'll probably also want to nurse for the snuggles alone, though. And all night, too. Yay.
Leo (July 23 - August 22)
A Leo, like an Aries, is a fire sign, so they hate being ignored — a fact that will become perfectly clear when they are mad, tired, or hungry. According to Astrology Zodiac Signs, they are passionate and loving, but also have a tendency to be self-centered. So, when you are feeding your Leo, you might want to put down your phone, or risk a crying lion's wrath.
Virgo (August 23 - September 22)
Virgos are known for being all work and no play. When it comes to breastfeeding, they might latch on, eat efficiently, and go about their day afterwards as if nothing really happened. If you worry that they aren't getting enough breast milk, best make an appointment to get your baby weighed. Virgos are the shiest sign of the Zodiac and might not speak up.
Libra (September 23 - October 22)
According to Astrology Zodiac Signs, Libras are indecisive, but they are also excellent team players. When it comes to breastfeeding, it's important to have buy-in from both you and your baby to make things work. Your Libra baby will try multiple paths to get there, sometimes all in the same nursing session. While you may get tired of them changing their mind all of the time, the plus side is that they are also keen problem-solvers, which may help when breastfeeding problems arise.
Scorpio (October 23 - November 21)
My oldest son is a Scorpio — passionate, determined, and calm, but also obsessive, compulsive, and jealous. He hardly ever cried as a baby, especially if my boob was in his mouth. He was possessive of me, and his compulsive side came out in his twiddling. OMG his twiddling drove me up a wall. He just had to touch my bare arm, stroke my hair, or play with my free nipple while nursing, which honestly made me want to crawl out of my own skin. He's now 5 years old, and is no longer nursing, but still likes to stroke my arm.
Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21)
According to Astrology Zodiac Signs, Sagittarius-born people have a tendency to be a temperamental, impatient bunch. So, if your supply gets low or your milk comes slow during the "witching hour," like mine did, they are going to let you know how they feel about it, in no uncertain terms.
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