When my sons were little, we had one bathroom. Four boys, their mom, and one bathroom. With a door that did not lock. You do the math. That bathroom was supposed to be my sanctuary, my one private place. Every parent reading this is killing themselves laughing at me right now. Because, as this mom's video about bathroom privacy so pointedly illustrates, there is no place sacred. Not when you're a parent. It's the dark truth no one told us.
Meredith Masonry, the truth-telling "That's Inappropriate" blogger, recently posted a video of herself trying to use the washroom. As the mother of three kids and a wife... well, you can just imagine. All Masonry is trying to do is use the toilet in peace, alone, like a normal person living in the 21st century is supposed to be able to expect.
Her children (and even her husband at one point) clearly do not agree. One child needs an agenda signed, and Masonry points out, "I don't think your teacher wants me to sign your agenda while I'm on the toilet, OK? We've got poop particles in the air, OK?" Next, another child wants to eat some gummies. And he wants her to open his fruit snacks while she's on the toilet. Because that's appetizing.
After the young gummy-eater comes the kid who wants to read to her mom. Masonry, beaten down but determined, has the presence of mind to praise her child's love of reading before scooting her out the door. That's, like, Mom-Level 1000. Her husband comes in looking for his wallet. Masonry, baffled, replies:
Do I have your wallet? In the bathroom? With me while I'm pooping?
The video ends with someone yelling from the other bathroom that they have triumphantly finished pooping and would like Masonry to come wipe them clean. And every parent everywhere is now nodding along in solemn understanding.
Masonry spoke to Parents about her bathroom video, explaining:
It simply amazes me that anyone would want to share a space with someone who is pooping.
She did, however, point out the irony of her children expecting their own privacy:
My oldest wants to be left alone while he is doing his business. But the other two welcome me in and ask that I sit with them. At no point do I want to spend time with anyone while they are pooping.