Matt Winkelmeyer/Getty Images Entertainment/Getty Images

Ryan Reynolds Shared The Chilling Story He Told His Daughter About Santa & Boy Oh Boy, It's Dark

By
Share
Ad failed to load

It's a Christmas tradition many families enjoy; reading a story to your kids on Christmas Eve. In my family, it's 'Twas The Night Before Christmas and always has been. Because apparently we are boring people with no imaginations at all. A lack of imagination is obviously not an issue for Ryan Reynolds. When Reynolds told his daughter a chilling story about Santa, he was seriously going off script. Because I don't remember this particular narrative popping up in any other Christmas tale I've personally heard.

In an Instagram post Reynolds posted on Christmas Day, the actor shared that he sat his daughter down in front of the fire to tell her a little tale about the big man in red... Santa Claus. Now, most of us know some version of the story of Santa Claus. He lives in the North Pole with a bunch of elves, eight reindeer, and his wife. As a group, they spend the year making toys for good little girls and boys so that Santa can deliver them by sleigh on Christmas Eve, coming down the chimney with his sack of toys on his back. The legend of Santa Claus has been around for hundreds of years and spans several countries.

That was all before Deadpool's Ryan Reynolds got a hold of him, apparently.

Ad failed to load

Reynolds shared on Instagram that he spoke to his daughter (I'm assuming it was his 3-year-old daughter James and not his 1-year-old daughter Ines, and I'm also assuming that this isn't exactly how it went) about Santa's arrival via chimney:

Ad failed to load
Ad failed to load

I mean... to each their own, I guess, right? I'm sure young James, the tow-headed daughter of Reynolds and his wife, Blake Lively (not to mention the adorable child's voice at the beginning of Taylor Swift's song "Gorgeous") was perfectly alright with the idea of Santa Claus being incinerated in her very own fireplace. And also, look closely at the fireplace for a moment; are those supposed to be Santa Claus' skinny legs standing without a body in the middle of the ashes?

Giphy

Of course, I think it's probably safe to assume that Reynolds was kidding and he didn't actually tell his daughter this tale. As he often does on social media about his family (I hope, anyways).

Ad failed to load

Anyone who follows Reynolds on social media is well aware of his general, self-deprecating schtick, and responded to his Instagram post about Santa Claus *potentially* burning to death in the fireplace flue with an utter lack of surprise at Reynolds' tongue-in-cheek humor.

"YES! I’m sure Santa wore his special fire proof suit that he used to wear when my kids were little too!" one of his followers commented on the post.

Ad failed to load

Another wrote, "I can't stop laughing!"

Reynolds isn't the only parent in the household with a wicked sense of humor; his wife, Gossip Girl's Blake Lively, posted a picture of some Christmas cookies Reynolds supposedly baked on Twitter:

Ad failed to load

Lively was nice enough to share a picture of Reynolds' baking effort on Friday, and it needs to be said that Lively is reportedly one hell of a baker (as evidenced by her plentiful scrumptious food posts on Instagram). But let's face facts; Reynolds might be a talented actor, a loving husband, and an all-around pretty hilarious guy, but he's no baker.

And perhaps he might want to rethink his holiday narrative for his daughter as well. Sure, it's great to be original. And going dark is certainly a favorite when it comes to Hollywood movie story arcs. But do you really want your daughter telling her friends that Santa was burned to death in her chimney?

Check out Romper's new video series, Romper's Doula Diaries:

Ad failed to load

Watch full episodes of Romper's Doula Diaries on Facebook Watch.

Ad failed to load
Must Reads

21 Moms Share The Most Surprising Part About Having A C-Section

Honestly, I don't think we, as a culture, talk about C-sections nearly enough, especially considering so many mothers experience them. And because of a number of factors, the little we do talk about it always seems to be a familiar narrative: "It's n…
By Jamie Kenney

13 Yummy Instant Pot Recipes To Make Under 30 Minutes

A Instant Pot seems to be the must-have appliance in every kitchen these days. If you are anything like me and never knew the beauty of a Instant Pot, you are about to have your life changed. Basically, you put some ingredients into a pot, set the te…
By Kristin Manna

9 Things The First Six Months Of Motherhood Will Teach You About Your Baby

Personally, the first six months of motherhood was a mixed bag. I learned some harsh lessons about myself that made taking care of my baby seem overwhelming. For example, I was clueless, and no amount of research could help me feel like anything but …
By Steph Montgomery

These Photos Of North West Then & Now Will Take You On A Sweet Trip Down Memory Lane

When Kim Kardashian welcomed her first daughter, North West, with her husband, Kanye West, in 2013, her whole life was changed. The social media and reality TV star became a mom for the first time and her Instagram presence took a very adorable turn.…
By Casey Suglia

11 Photos You *Must* Take During The Last Days Of Your Pregnancy

During my first pregnancy, I took a photo each week to document my growing belly. I stopped around 36 weeks, though. I hated how I looked in those pictures, and didn't think I'd want to relive those moments. I was wrong. My second pregnancy was a dum…
By Steph Montgomery

This Is What It Means If Your Pregnancy Test Changes Overnight

The time between when a woman suspects she might be pregnant and when it is confirmed for sure is the longest of her life. Regardless of whether you are hoping for a positive or a negative result, the odds are good that you are sweating bullets when …
By Shannon Evans

6 Red Flags To Definitely Look Out For After Your Baby Falls

The first time my infant son tried to take a few steps, he tumbled and bumped his head on the coffee table. My blood turned to ice in my veins and I froze. There truly isn't anything quite like the feeling a parent gets when their little one gets hur…
By Sarah Bunton

These 9 Instant Pot Recipes Will Make Even The Pickiest Eater Happy At The Table

Like any parent, I've had my share of parenting hits and misses, but one of my favorite "wins" is my daughter's diverse palate. I don't even know if I can take credit for it, but I would like to think I had something to do with her love for lentils, …
By Caroline Shannon-Karasik

Turns Out, Kim Kardashian's Favorite Mom Products Look A Lot Like Your Own Faves

Being a mom is really hard work, especially for the first few months, and Kim Kardashian West is no different in that regard. Now the mother of three, Kardashian says that there are a few products she just can't live without when it comes to raising …
By Abi Berwager Schreier

Soda Might Hurt Your Fertility, Study Says, & Here's What You Can Do

Who doesn't love sugary drinks? I stopped drinking soda years ago, but I still love gulping down those fancy Starbucks coffee beverages. I don't have a big sweet tooth, but I am a sucker for sugar-sweetened beverages every now-and-then. Turns out, th…
By Annamarya Scaccia

10 Things No One Tells You About Having A Baby In Your 30s

If you're like me, you evaluate the pros and cons of any major life decision. When my husband and I were considering starting a family, I thought about my career, education, and financial stability. I wanted to know how a pregnancy and childbirth wou…
By Steph Montgomery

This Woman Thought She Had An Eyelash Stuck In Her Eye. Then It Moved.

I'm not a person who is easily icked out. As a kid, I collected bugs and thought I was going to be an entomologist and asked Santa Claus for ant farms and nets to catch bees. I'm still super curious about anything that flies and crawls, which might s…
By Karen Fratti

5 Red Flags Your Toddler Isn't Eating Enough

Toddlers are notoriously picky eaters, at least in my experience. You offer mashed potatoes, they want french fries. You give them crackers, they scream for chips. It's frustrating, to be sure, but it's usually their way of vying for independence. It…
By Candace Ganger

35 Moms Share The Most Disgusting Things Their Husbands Do

I'm a human being who revels in challenges. I like when people present me with one, especially if they don't think I can meet or succeed it, and I like taking a challenge on, especially if it's unexpected. So when I aimed to uncover the most disgusti…
By Jamie Kenney

How Having Kids In Your 20s Affects You Later In Life

For parents, like myself, who had kids in their 20s, there are a number of questions that come to mind. When you're deciding what your future will look like, you'll likely consider what this means for your health, career, and more down the line. Thin…
By Tessa Shull

Study: Drinking Two Glasses Of Wine A Day Is Good For Your Mind — Here's Why

There’s more scientific proof that a daily drink or two isn't necessarily a bad thing and could have a place in an overall healthy lifestyle. A new study out of the University of Rochester Medical Center (URMC) in New York found that — in mice, at le…
By Tiffany Thomas

8 "Mistakes" I'm Glad I Made During My First Pregnancy

As an adult, I've learned you never really stop hating being told what to do. When I was pregnant I was getting instructions at every turn, from doctors, relatives, and complete strangers on the subway. I would nod and smile but then go about making …
By Liza Wyles

Research Says Eating Carbs Can Lead To A Healthy Pregnancy, So Bring On The Pasta

In the world of me, no food is better than bread. I know it's supposed to be pretty terrible for you, high in calories, low in protein, and full of that modern-day demon, gluten... but guys, it's really yummy. Especially warm out of the oven, when th…
By Jen McGuire

These Photos Of Prince George Then & Now Will Give You Serious Baby Fever

The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge are expecting their third child in Spring 2018. With all of the excitement surrounding the new baby, it's easy to forget all of the good times that have already passed. The couple's eldest is already well into the sc…
By Azure Hall

This Is, Hands Down, The *Grossest* Thing Babies Do Inside The Womb

Your baby's life in the womb may be safe and warm, but it's also kind of grody. Seriously, the whole process of growing into a human being includes more than a few icky moments along the way. But this is the grossest thing babies do inside the womb b…
By Lindsay E. Mack